into: Things. Many things. Lots of things. God I'm fucking bored.

makes me happy: Killing puppies to make your Cheerios. More people should thank me for that. Alas.

makes me sad: Mrs. Doubtfire. I'm completely serious here, I've seen some of the most depressing movies ever made, and no movie gets me as depressed as Mrs. Doubtfire. There may be something wrong with me.

5 things i can't live without: My penis is five items.

vices: Every Cheerio is made out of a dead puppy, you know, and I am the one who kills the puppies used to make your breakfast cereal. Next time you sit down to a bowl of Cheerios, think of me and think of the puppies.

thoughts on sg: I hate it

occupation: Horrid retail shit

current crush: Ted Koppel, but he will never love me.

stats: Skinny

body mods: I have this really tiny bit of skin mid-torso that sorta pokes out but I'm thinking of having a doctor look at it to make sure it's not cancerous.

heroes: Emperor Joshua Norton I

gets me hot: Women, especially good=looking ones in some stage of undress.

favorite position: The one where I hold a pillow over her face and she dies and doesn't get my semen because she's a whore and she doesn't deserve it that skank

fantasy: Someday I want to touch a woman's boobs. I hear they're pretty sweet.

sign: Pisces, but who gives a shit really

most humbling moment: Realizing that having the online nickname Ted Koppel would cause people to call me that.

i lost my virginity: Because the fucking sluts are always stealing things from me.

CIGARETTES: Nope

MY DIET: Omnivore

ALCOHOL: Occasionally

MY DRUG USE: Drug Free

I AM LOOKING FOR: a woman

MY KINK FACTOR: I'll try anything once, especially if you beg for it.

MY POLITICS: Bleeding-heart Liberal

POT: Nope

MY STATUS: single

I WANT: Romance, Booty, Friendship

MY PIGEONHOLES: Indie Rocker, Bookworm, Geek, Gamer, Fuck you, I defy categories