I'm not Jared god damn it! For like the second time in a week, I've had somebody call me Jared. Just because I'm a tall pasty white guy with glasses doesn't make me Subway's mascot. Jeez! Not to sound un-PC here, but for some reason I haven't been called Jared by another white person. Today it was a black guy who smelled like crabs (and probably works with the local crab company*), and Thursday it was a Hispanic lady with her child who said, "Aren't you Jared?". I responded with a pilot version of "No, dumbass, I'm not Jared.". I really shouldn't be complaining about something I find midly amusing, but whatever. Next time somebody confuses me with Jared, I'll be like "I am Jared, and eating at Subway gave me cancer." or "I am Jared, and I started eating at Quizno's!".

*in case your wondering what the crab company smells like (I forget what the place where you prepare crabs is called), it smells a hell of a lot worse than the crabs taste.