It strikes me as funny how people who claim to be my best or close friend have made it extremely obvious the past 2 days that they really dont care about me. Part of being a true friend is being there when they need you. This sometimes requires you to set your own problems aside and give your friend a kind word, offer your fucking ear, I dont knowjust acknowledge they still exist.
Apparently not everyone feels this way. No Im not just angry or over emotional cuz Im dealing with this death. This has been bothering me for monthsI just have kept my mouth shut. Always letting those I love walk all over me.
Go ahead, take me for fucking granted because I am done with you now. I am tired of never being considered by people who are more than willing to use me up when its convenient for them. I have thus far kept all of you as friends mostly for appearances. But every time I hurt, every time I need a friend, and you dont even bother, I begin to despise you.
I have some of the most supportive people that comment on this journal especially when I need them. It just really gets me that its never the people who swore to love me forever.
Im fed up. Tired. Sick of not feeling important enough to even receive a Hi, how you doing. Im just fucking angry and want to delete all but about 10 people off my friends list. And yet, I still dont know if I will do it because I still worry about their feelings.
How fucking pathetic.
Dear Lord,
Move me to Missouri soon. I want to be with the man who loves me more than anyone possible could. I want to find a new job. I want to conquer my fear of navigating a new town. I want to start our little family. And mostly I want to leave every hurtful piece of shit behind me.
Love
Laura
*goes off to a corner to cry*
EDIT TO ADD: I just took over 100 people off my friends list. If you are one of those people, chances are either:
1. We never talk
Or
2. You are someone I love very much and you hurt me by making me feel like you dont give two shits about me. It was so hard to erase some of youbut Im tired of feeling like Im only good enough when you need something from me be it a bill needs to be paid, money, a shoulder, advice. Ask yourself this before you get butthurt.when was the last time you actually asked me if I was okay? Ask yourself when the last time was that you really were there for me when I needed you. Ask yourself if you know when the last time was that I needed you.
Im spent
Apparently not everyone feels this way. No Im not just angry or over emotional cuz Im dealing with this death. This has been bothering me for monthsI just have kept my mouth shut. Always letting those I love walk all over me.
Go ahead, take me for fucking granted because I am done with you now. I am tired of never being considered by people who are more than willing to use me up when its convenient for them. I have thus far kept all of you as friends mostly for appearances. But every time I hurt, every time I need a friend, and you dont even bother, I begin to despise you.
I have some of the most supportive people that comment on this journal especially when I need them. It just really gets me that its never the people who swore to love me forever.
Im fed up. Tired. Sick of not feeling important enough to even receive a Hi, how you doing. Im just fucking angry and want to delete all but about 10 people off my friends list. And yet, I still dont know if I will do it because I still worry about their feelings.
How fucking pathetic.
Dear Lord,
Move me to Missouri soon. I want to be with the man who loves me more than anyone possible could. I want to find a new job. I want to conquer my fear of navigating a new town. I want to start our little family. And mostly I want to leave every hurtful piece of shit behind me.
Love
Laura
*goes off to a corner to cry*
EDIT TO ADD: I just took over 100 people off my friends list. If you are one of those people, chances are either:
1. We never talk
Or
2. You are someone I love very much and you hurt me by making me feel like you dont give two shits about me. It was so hard to erase some of youbut Im tired of feeling like Im only good enough when you need something from me be it a bill needs to be paid, money, a shoulder, advice. Ask yourself this before you get butthurt.when was the last time you actually asked me if I was okay? Ask yourself when the last time was that you really were there for me when I needed you. Ask yourself if you know when the last time was that I needed you.
Im spent
VIEW 25 of 25 COMMENTS
So sorry to hear about your loss. Big hugs of love to you now and always!!
Love you lots............
<3