She held in the tears knowing I wouldn't feel them even if they fell on me. Words didn't need to be spoken. She felt it too, and knew it as well as I did, if I had her…I'd be afraid of hating her. The unattainable losses something when the pedestal is removed. If she were to allow me inside her, I might really see her, and that can never be, because I might recognize my self staring back.