a true test of one's willpower, i have now gone 200 days with out sex or masterbation. this is all a willing choice of my own. there have been 2 lovley ladies that have caught me at moments of weakness and could have ended my sex strike. but do to circumstances they didnt. before i get the usual responses i'll go ahead and answer the questions
why? sex and masterbation although great are only temporary sources of happiness the leave me with either feelings of guilt or disatisfaction. mostly with the sex it seems for me that the 15 minutes before i fall asleep are the best, but when i wake up i start to wonder whats going on in her mind about me and my performance. and since i'm distrustful of what people actually say to me i tend not to ask, that and i heard it was rude to ask for a performance feedback. i cannot tell how well my performance was based on the noises made during the act becuase the ever popular "faking it" rumor. so feel like the ass even if i was not the one that instigated it.
another reason i went on a sex strike was it just felt right, in my path to balance and enlightment i have traveled to the extremes by natures design and now i choose to do so by will. the first 18 years of my life i was celibate because of nature but i jerked off so manytimes in a day that i would end up dehydrated. after i figured out how to get laid i proceeded to do so until it caused much drama. which i cant figure out how it is my fault. and left me with one question. if i make arrangements for a one night stand, and make it perfectly clear that its just strickly sex, and the lady is ok with this. then she proceeds to tell one of her friends about the deal or something odd that i do, and the friends are curious to find out first hand. and i make the same deal with them. when they start getting jealous of each other how does that make me the asshole?
those are the reasons i am on a sex strike as for the masterbation. i just lost all interest in that even though its one of the few things i am really good at.
but the time i used to devote to temporary happiness has allowed me to put that energy to use in other areas. such as i am currently rereading THE ART OF WAR, and figuring out how to relate it to relationships and picking up dates. this can all be traced back to the fact the TAO of STEVE was on tv for about a week straght when i started this adventure. it actually made sence to me when i relized that almost every woman i have ever been with in my life, i showed little or no interest in, and they wouldnt leave me alone, until i started paying attention to them then they started ignoring me. it seems to me as people we chase those that want nothing or little to do with us then once and if we do catch them we have little or no interest in them. but there are those few people that arent like that, and they may actually find a true balance.
ok time i ended this cuase i know no one is going to sit here and read all of what i just wrote. but if anyone can arugue against my celibacy or any thing else feel free to try.
why? sex and masterbation although great are only temporary sources of happiness the leave me with either feelings of guilt or disatisfaction. mostly with the sex it seems for me that the 15 minutes before i fall asleep are the best, but when i wake up i start to wonder whats going on in her mind about me and my performance. and since i'm distrustful of what people actually say to me i tend not to ask, that and i heard it was rude to ask for a performance feedback. i cannot tell how well my performance was based on the noises made during the act becuase the ever popular "faking it" rumor. so feel like the ass even if i was not the one that instigated it.
another reason i went on a sex strike was it just felt right, in my path to balance and enlightment i have traveled to the extremes by natures design and now i choose to do so by will. the first 18 years of my life i was celibate because of nature but i jerked off so manytimes in a day that i would end up dehydrated. after i figured out how to get laid i proceeded to do so until it caused much drama. which i cant figure out how it is my fault. and left me with one question. if i make arrangements for a one night stand, and make it perfectly clear that its just strickly sex, and the lady is ok with this. then she proceeds to tell one of her friends about the deal or something odd that i do, and the friends are curious to find out first hand. and i make the same deal with them. when they start getting jealous of each other how does that make me the asshole?
those are the reasons i am on a sex strike as for the masterbation. i just lost all interest in that even though its one of the few things i am really good at.
but the time i used to devote to temporary happiness has allowed me to put that energy to use in other areas. such as i am currently rereading THE ART OF WAR, and figuring out how to relate it to relationships and picking up dates. this can all be traced back to the fact the TAO of STEVE was on tv for about a week straght when i started this adventure. it actually made sence to me when i relized that almost every woman i have ever been with in my life, i showed little or no interest in, and they wouldnt leave me alone, until i started paying attention to them then they started ignoring me. it seems to me as people we chase those that want nothing or little to do with us then once and if we do catch them we have little or no interest in them. but there are those few people that arent like that, and they may actually find a true balance.
ok time i ended this cuase i know no one is going to sit here and read all of what i just wrote. but if anyone can arugue against my celibacy or any thing else feel free to try.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
nala:
fucked at birth? really?
clara:
Thanks! 