All I can say is.. I feel ya. I just keep thinking if I put good out there, maybe it'll add up to enough that just a little bit might come back to me...
I find myself in that head space more often than I would like. Sometimes I use up all my patience at work and am an ass when I come home, but those aren't the people that have been shitting on me and don't deserve the wrath. People in our occupation kind of have a reputation for being assholes for a reason. Lots of pressure for very little reward and very few thank yous. The release of unleashing a little hate feels good for a while but if you live in that moment too long you end up alone unleashing the hate on your self or your dog. Hang in there man, good times come back around eventually.
I know exactly where you're coming from...it's always those whom are kind and always try their best with others for reasons that they don't know why and never get it back..its a case of either being around the wrong people or just walking away from those whom don't care or don't give back...sadly,this world is full of people like that...
Sometimes there is only so much you can put up...I do know exactly what you mean...it's like giving love to people and they throw it back or don't care....don't stay in the hate for too long else it will eat you up...good luck...and if I were you I would ditch the friend who spread what you told them in confidence...you can't trust them so what's the point...thinking of you..
Lesque