Things went from bad to worse and may soon find myself without a job.
I'm looking for some freelance work! Need a website built? Logo designed? Blog skinned? Image photoshopped? Dog walked?! Know someone that is? Send me a PM please. I would greatly appreciate any leads at all.
Ugh.
Rain rain rain!
I'm looking for some freelance work! Need a website built? Logo designed? Blog skinned? Image photoshopped? Dog walked?! Know someone that is? Send me a PM please. I would greatly appreciate any leads at all.
Ugh.
Rain rain rain!
I just got back from LA. A trip mostly for work, but partially for play. Play with him. I'll apologize in advance, because this entry is going to be a little bit emo, a little bit personal, a little lacking in sexy time photos and a lot wordy. As you may have seen in my previous journal, San Francisco is a pretty great place, and I'm adjusting well to it. For the most part, great people, lots to do, amazing food. The only thing missing goes back a few months. I have no trouble calling it the biggest mistake of my life.
What do you do when all you want to do is go back, but there's no going back? Immersed in new world without the one person you really want to share it all with. Moving away had the opposite effect of what I had hoped. It's really amazing how easily something, or someone, can be taken for granted, disrespected, ignored. It's only after they're gone that everything is clear.
He was pretty much the most amazing man ever. Not to make him sound dead or anything though. He's perfect in most every way. Good looking, stylish, brilliant, and a fantastic sense of humor. He had the best personality of anyone I've ever met. The ability to light up a room as soon as he entered, if only due to him acting like a hilarious ass. I've never been able to be more myself than in his company. All the little things I saw as flaws, he saw as perfections. He'd come home with random tiny surprises. Tiny surprises that meant more than anything large and expensive could. My fuzzy blanket. We shared so much in common. He loved the food I cooked, and supported it even when it didn't taste so good. He loved me, even if I hadn't showered in two days, had straggly hair, dirty glasses and a box of embarrassing medicine in my hand. His family was amazing, and I miss them as much as I miss being around him all of the time. He made great sacrifices, and stayed strong and by my side through really tough times. I hate to sound uber cliche, but I feel like he was my soul mate, and I let him go, I pushed him away, I tossed him out. All my fault.
Now I just feel mostly empty if not for the heavy feeling of regret and self hate. Just waiting till the next time we happen to see other. Going through the daily motions.. I just don't know what to do with myself anymore.


What do you do when all you want to do is go back, but there's no going back? Immersed in new world without the one person you really want to share it all with. Moving away had the opposite effect of what I had hoped. It's really amazing how easily something, or someone, can be taken for granted, disrespected, ignored. It's only after they're gone that everything is clear.
He was pretty much the most amazing man ever. Not to make him sound dead or anything though. He's perfect in most every way. Good looking, stylish, brilliant, and a fantastic sense of humor. He had the best personality of anyone I've ever met. The ability to light up a room as soon as he entered, if only due to him acting like a hilarious ass. I've never been able to be more myself than in his company. All the little things I saw as flaws, he saw as perfections. He'd come home with random tiny surprises. Tiny surprises that meant more than anything large and expensive could. My fuzzy blanket. We shared so much in common. He loved the food I cooked, and supported it even when it didn't taste so good. He loved me, even if I hadn't showered in two days, had straggly hair, dirty glasses and a box of embarrassing medicine in my hand. His family was amazing, and I miss them as much as I miss being around him all of the time. He made great sacrifices, and stayed strong and by my side through really tough times. I hate to sound uber cliche, but I feel like he was my soul mate, and I let him go, I pushed him away, I tossed him out. All my fault.
Now I just feel mostly empty if not for the heavy feeling of regret and self hate. Just waiting till the next time we happen to see other. Going through the daily motions.. I just don't know what to do with myself anymore.

First off, thanks very much to those that sent me treats off my Wishlist for my birthday! Finally my own copy of Halo 3, and oh so many chocolate bars! Mmmm! Thank you thank you thank you!
My new set (actually a bit old!) just went up into Member Review. If you have a moment, please check it out! Contrary to how it may look, it has no tie in with the release of Get Smart, heh. I really like it, and twwly did an awesome job at PSing it. Minus the naked under the jacket, that's how I usually dress day to day. Futurego!


I've also fallen in love... with my hetero life partner Jaylin. She's pretty much the coolest lady ever and I have no idea how I went through life without her! I miss her so much right now! I've no doubt we were instantly bonded due to our Canadian roots. Everytime we hang out, my stomach hurts so much from laughing.


SF is still pretty amazing. Being in LA made me realize I've become attached to everything that is SF. Staying downtown on Friday night was pretty lame, knowing I couldn't just go out and catch the Muni anywhere, or tweet a meet up location and have 10 friends show up. I love how small the city is, how accessible and interesting. It's pretty great.
Here are some mooooore pictures from the past little while!
My first V0 ever:


My Canadian brother Ryan:


Just love this picture:


Bacon Maple cupcakes from CupcakeCamp:




Where I work!


And if you aren't already, join me on twitter!
My new set (actually a bit old!) just went up into Member Review. If you have a moment, please check it out! Contrary to how it may look, it has no tie in with the release of Get Smart, heh. I really like it, and twwly did an awesome job at PSing it. Minus the naked under the jacket, that's how I usually dress day to day. Futurego!

I've also fallen in love... with my hetero life partner Jaylin. She's pretty much the coolest lady ever and I have no idea how I went through life without her! I miss her so much right now! I've no doubt we were instantly bonded due to our Canadian roots. Everytime we hang out, my stomach hurts so much from laughing.

SF is still pretty amazing. Being in LA made me realize I've become attached to everything that is SF. Staying downtown on Friday night was pretty lame, knowing I couldn't just go out and catch the Muni anywhere, or tweet a meet up location and have 10 friends show up. I love how small the city is, how accessible and interesting. It's pretty great.
Here are some mooooore pictures from the past little while!
My first V0 ever:

My Canadian brother Ryan:

Just love this picture:

Bacon Maple cupcakes from CupcakeCamp:


Where I work!

And if you aren't already, join me on twitter!
O hai! It's been a long while! San Francisco living in overwhelming in many, many ways. It's been a big adjustment. I got lucky and moved here knowing a lot of people, so it's been hanging out and tech parties consistently. Finally moved in with some roommates last week. Also reunited with my cat, Forest Whiticat, after a lengthy month. The place is awesome, but I'm poor in SF so it's not so super homey yet. The location is all kinds of awesome though. Really central to everything. Fell in love with the Alembic over in Upper Haight, and Lucky 13 in the Castro. They have such good beer at both places. Mmm Trois Pistoles.
I co-organized San Francisco's first CupcakeCamp! It was held yesterday at CitizenSpace and was an incredible success. We had no idea so many people would come out. Around 300 or so showed up. Did an interview about it all for Geek Entertainment TV, so stay tuned for that!
Work is still pretty amazing. Got promoted to Interface Developer and working out of the best coworking space around. Coworking is seriously where it is at.
I also took up climbing. I fucking love bouldering. It's the most fun I've ever had in a "work out" activity. It challenges both body and mind. I'm pretty much addicted to it now, and look forward to doing some bouldering outdoors toward the end of summer. Eeee!
Oh oh! And my birthday is this week! SFers, look in the SGSF group for the celebration details. And if you're feeling generous, hehe.
Was trying to upload some pics but it won't work. Sad face!
I co-organized San Francisco's first CupcakeCamp! It was held yesterday at CitizenSpace and was an incredible success. We had no idea so many people would come out. Around 300 or so showed up. Did an interview about it all for Geek Entertainment TV, so stay tuned for that!
Work is still pretty amazing. Got promoted to Interface Developer and working out of the best coworking space around. Coworking is seriously where it is at.
I also took up climbing. I fucking love bouldering. It's the most fun I've ever had in a "work out" activity. It challenges both body and mind. I'm pretty much addicted to it now, and look forward to doing some bouldering outdoors toward the end of summer. Eeee!
Oh oh! And my birthday is this week! SFers, look in the SGSF group for the celebration details. And if you're feeling generous, hehe.
Was trying to upload some pics but it won't work. Sad face!
Daven and I shot a multi set while I was in Chicago in February. tmronin did an awesome job set! We submitted it for member review, and the sexiest duo contest. It was tons of fun to shoot, since Daven is so goddamn hot. Hope y'all enjoy it!
Check out The Movie Theater!





Check out The Movie Theater!



I acquired a new nerdface tattoo. Check it out!


The issue at hand in the previous journal was solved, so stay tuned.
The past month has been ridiculously busy and full of change. Since returning from Austin, I've decided to relocate north to San Francisco and be at the center of the tech action, surrounded by real people, great food and public transportion. Los Angeles, or rather Fullerton is great weather wise, but just isn't cutting it anymore. So as of April 22nd, I'll be a permanent resident of SF.
I also got a promotion at work, and am officially back into web development playing the role of Front End Developer at the best company I've ever worked at.
For more current and random updates, follow me on twitter. Microblogging ftw.
I hope you're all listening to Homer Hiccolm and the Rocketboys, as they are amazing ambient rock, and MGMT just because they are pure awesome, right down to their website.
Gotta get back to tending to the poor, sick Scopitone so I leave you all with a collection of photos from sxsw and beyond featuring some of my favorite people.
Sticker tags, a brilliant idea from the last.fm folks.. like flaneur








Just because Pete Cashmore is the hottest thing in Internet ever:


The issue at hand in the previous journal was solved, so stay tuned.
The past month has been ridiculously busy and full of change. Since returning from Austin, I've decided to relocate north to San Francisco and be at the center of the tech action, surrounded by real people, great food and public transportion. Los Angeles, or rather Fullerton is great weather wise, but just isn't cutting it anymore. So as of April 22nd, I'll be a permanent resident of SF.
I also got a promotion at work, and am officially back into web development playing the role of Front End Developer at the best company I've ever worked at.
For more current and random updates, follow me on twitter. Microblogging ftw.
I hope you're all listening to Homer Hiccolm and the Rocketboys, as they are amazing ambient rock, and MGMT just because they are pure awesome, right down to their website.
Gotta get back to tending to the poor, sick Scopitone so I leave you all with a collection of photos from sxsw and beyond featuring some of my favorite people.
Sticker tags, a brilliant idea from the last.fm folks.. like flaneur




Just because Pete Cashmore is the hottest thing in Internet ever:

It's all a real shame. I rather have credibility than be portrayed by SG as some vapid drunk girl playing a video game. Y'all know where I'm at.
Oh but hey, G4 featured me for being an actual gamer (and hot)
Oh but hey, G4 featured me for being an actual gamer (and hot)
This long blogging stuff is becoming definitely Not For Me. If you're interested in regular updates, follow me over on Twitter at twitter.com/poshy.
I've picked up a fondness for shooting real guns over the past little while. I wish I could make it a weekly event, but that's very inefficient, and likely the rage build up won't be significant enough to make the shootin' as enjoyable. Okay, that's a lie. But shooting is seriously one of my favorite things to do now. The loudness once frightened me, but now each time I hear a shot fire, I enjoy it a bit more. The whole act is so satisfying. Especially when my aim is on! Last Friday I went, and changed up my targets from the donut eating cup with the wedding ring, to Jeremy Sisto Terrorist and my new favorite, The Hostage target. This target is great, and I wish I had a picture of it to post right now. Basically, it's a terrorist holding a fidgeting woman with what could be a look of fear, but resembling more of a CITM feel. I was really proud. In all my shooting, I only maimed her once! And it was in her arm, which will definitely heal. But him? Oh I shot him in the eye. And the arm many times, so I have no doubt, if that were a real situation, he would have dropped his gun. Television training FTW! Oh yeah, and I shot a big ass shotgun a couple weeks ago. Pics to follow.
But I'm not really gun crazy. I did other things too! Like, go to Chicago! Last weekend I flew out to the cold, icy streets of Chicago for a secret SG shoot with Azula, Daven and Ravyn. Two shoots actually. Daven and I got a little action going on a second time. I took a lesson from Anthony Bourdain and tasted Chicago flavor, which was essentially a salad on a hot dog. It was large, and overwhelming but the celery salt really made it fly. I also ate some frito pie and learned that I really don't miss the snow at all. Nor the cold. Also picked up the new McSweeney's book which is fucking hilarious.
I also went to that Chanology Scientology Protest. It was a very surreal experience. The turnout was considerably greater than I had expected. The Scientology spy trucks were obvious and hilarious. The guards looked as though they were cast for their parts. I welcome being in their hater database.
Next week it's off to Austin, Texas for SXSW Interactive, and boy howdy am I ever excited! Last year was all kinds of fun working with the Red Bull folks and the other SGs. This year, I'm there for professional reasons, as I've organized a trip for my company out there. Also, parties. Really looking forward to the parties.. And meeting Jeremy Keith and Jeffery Zeldman, amongst a bunch of other usability/WaSP folks.
TOMORROW though!! Tomorrow I have to get a ROOT CANAL!!! Not only that, but also a crown elongation. Yay gum and tooth scraping! I'm so scared it's ridiculous. After the terrible experience that was my wisdom teeth removal, I forever fear the dental visit. The sounds, the needles, oh dear. They didn't even give me any good meds.
My boss teaching:






Tiny protesters:




New dress!


How I get out of every ticket:


Sorry if you're not on broadband!
I've picked up a fondness for shooting real guns over the past little while. I wish I could make it a weekly event, but that's very inefficient, and likely the rage build up won't be significant enough to make the shootin' as enjoyable. Okay, that's a lie. But shooting is seriously one of my favorite things to do now. The loudness once frightened me, but now each time I hear a shot fire, I enjoy it a bit more. The whole act is so satisfying. Especially when my aim is on! Last Friday I went, and changed up my targets from the donut eating cup with the wedding ring, to Jeremy Sisto Terrorist and my new favorite, The Hostage target. This target is great, and I wish I had a picture of it to post right now. Basically, it's a terrorist holding a fidgeting woman with what could be a look of fear, but resembling more of a CITM feel. I was really proud. In all my shooting, I only maimed her once! And it was in her arm, which will definitely heal. But him? Oh I shot him in the eye. And the arm many times, so I have no doubt, if that were a real situation, he would have dropped his gun. Television training FTW! Oh yeah, and I shot a big ass shotgun a couple weeks ago. Pics to follow.
But I'm not really gun crazy. I did other things too! Like, go to Chicago! Last weekend I flew out to the cold, icy streets of Chicago for a secret SG shoot with Azula, Daven and Ravyn. Two shoots actually. Daven and I got a little action going on a second time. I took a lesson from Anthony Bourdain and tasted Chicago flavor, which was essentially a salad on a hot dog. It was large, and overwhelming but the celery salt really made it fly. I also ate some frito pie and learned that I really don't miss the snow at all. Nor the cold. Also picked up the new McSweeney's book which is fucking hilarious.
I also went to that Chanology Scientology Protest. It was a very surreal experience. The turnout was considerably greater than I had expected. The Scientology spy trucks were obvious and hilarious. The guards looked as though they were cast for their parts. I welcome being in their hater database.
Next week it's off to Austin, Texas for SXSW Interactive, and boy howdy am I ever excited! Last year was all kinds of fun working with the Red Bull folks and the other SGs. This year, I'm there for professional reasons, as I've organized a trip for my company out there. Also, parties. Really looking forward to the parties.. And meeting Jeremy Keith and Jeffery Zeldman, amongst a bunch of other usability/WaSP folks.
TOMORROW though!! Tomorrow I have to get a ROOT CANAL!!! Not only that, but also a crown elongation. Yay gum and tooth scraping! I'm so scared it's ridiculous. After the terrible experience that was my wisdom teeth removal, I forever fear the dental visit. The sounds, the needles, oh dear. They didn't even give me any good meds.
My boss teaching:



Tiny protesters:


New dress!

How I get out of every ticket:

Sorry if you're not on broadband!
Outsourcing cheap tech labor makes me entirely sad. Sometimes I feel like my entire background in design and dev has been totally meaningless. I need a new project before I fully believe I have no more useful skills. Today is totally an emo day. Weeee!
Remember when I designed ties for a year? Hahaha!
Remember when I designed ties for a year? Hahaha!
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