I've Got No Brakes. No Brakes. NO BRAKES.

So we almost died and/or killed some other people today.

Did you know that brake fluid is something you're supposed to check regularly*, like your oil or your antifreeze/coolant? I do... now!

On the way to pick up popcorn from work today, a semi-truck slammed on it's brakes hard enough to force me to also slam on mine hard enough to send the dog toppling over into my lap. I mention this because it will seem more significant in retrospect. I may or may not have had my seat-belt on, I can't remember.

A few minutes later, I pull up in front of our work, she hops in the car, and we turn around to head home. As we're pulling onto the highway, I say, "That's weird, it seems like I'm having to push the brake pedal further down to stop than I usually have to, like almost to the floor. They were fine on the way up here." Mere seconds later, on the highway -- 3:00pm traffic, by the way -- the cars in front of us brake sharply as one car exits. I push the brake pedal down, and...


...nothing happens. Fractions of a second, but it seems like it only gradually dawns on me as I say, "I've got no brakes. No brakes. NO BRAKES." I swerve wildly onto the side of the road to avoid the car in front of me, looking for a place to coast to a stop or something soft to crash into or something, I dunno, and swear to god, some guy changing his tire on the side of the road barely dives out of the way. Poor guy.

I realize during this that we're too broke to have it towed, but that if we leave it on the side of the road we'll get a ticket for abandoning it, so I pull off at the next exit, pulling the brake pedal back up with my foot and them mashing it back down... this works a bit so I can slow it down to under 10mph, turn on the caution lights and limp it to a tune-up shop. Call my father-in-law, who chastises us for not checking the brake fluid recently (where are you supposed to learn these things?) and says it sounds like we're 'just' out of brake fluid.

Anyway, long story short, shop flushes the system and replaces the brake fluid, and all seems well again. Car does not appear to be leaking anything.

Moral of the story: check your brake fluid.


*you'd think they'd fucking label that shit, eh?

That's good that everyone got out unscathed.

But that's totally why driving disconcerts me sometimes. The actual driving is okay, but so much can go wrong with a car, and I've no idea how a car works or how to fix it. If I got a flat tyre, I'd be totally rooted. If the brakes stopped working, I'd be really confused. If steam started rising from the bonnet, I'd pull over and maybe run away from the car, expecting it to set on fire or something. Maybe.

For all the talk of my generation being a bit 'tarded when it comes to practical skills - a sentiment I mostly disagree with - there's something to be said for knowing how a car works, and, more importantly, how to fix it. Everyone above the age of 30 seems to have that sorted.

On the plus side, it was sort of a wakeup call for me. You see, I tend to put off doing anything that doesn't seem urgent or have a deadline attached to it -- cleaning the house, routine maintenance, etc. Today was the first time I was confronted with the reality that neglecting my adult-like responsibilities could lead not just to inconvenience and/or expense, but... urm... flaming, mangled death.

For example, speaking of changing flat tires and neglecting things... I actually do know how to change a flat, but I couldn't in our car even if I wanted to because the trunk -- where the spare is -- won't open. I realized the likelihood of this occurence right when the problem started, but I have yet to have it fixed.


When did the trunk stop opening? During our honeymoon.


How long have we been married? Almost two years. I think there's still a suitcase in there with some t-shirts in it that I've been missing.

Hmm... I've never thought about that before. I go to a shop and get my oil changed every three months. They are supposed to check all the fluids. I'll have to ask if they check the brake fluid as well.

I didn't know what to do with my first car and I was fairly broke all the time. I would just randomly put fluid in different places, whenever something didn't seem right. I had the car for almost a year, then sold it because it didn't seem right. Shortly after, I hear from the friend I sold it to, it broke. His dad was a mechanic, so he fixed it for him and it broke again. It looks like I sold it at the right time. I would feel sorry for my friend, but I sold it to him for real cheap.

I have no point.

glad to hear no one was hurt -- that would be frightening.

just curious if you tried your emergency brake? while it probably wouldn't have stopped you as well as your wheel brakes when approaching the stopped cars, it hopefully would have slowed you down some.

I was about to, but only as a last resort. I was afraid that, somehow, if I used it to stop I'd burn it out and be unable to move the car again without having it towed. Fortunately I didn't have to use it.

[Edited on Apr 15, 2006 by Keith]

Thanks for informing us...and glad you weren't hurt

Jesus, Keith!

Glad you guys are okay! Check yer brakes!

Glad to hear you didn't get hurt.

I wish they'd teach this shit in Driver's Ed. And, just in case it happens again, your emergency brake won't "burn out." Your brakes are hydraulic (ergo hydraulic brake fluid). Your emergency brake is mechanical (a long cable). But they essentially do the same thing via 2 different styles of "triggers." So, next time feel free to use it. The worst that happens is you lock up the rear wheels a little and you flat spot the tires. The back end may get screwy but you steer with the front tires and those aren't locking so you should be fine. Always better to hit the car ahead of you at 40 instead of 60.

Nah. I've driven for miles with the emergency brake on. Of course when I finally realized it was because I saw the smoke.

Anyway, glad to hear you're ok.

i have a break fluid leak (a small one), i have to fill-up at lease once a month

My breaks lines were ruptured before. Not fun. I've still have nightmares about it sometimes.

that's terrifying! i'm glad you guys all ended up okay!

Cor!!!!

Don't any of you ever give even a cursory glance to the safety-critical parts of your car? Checking brake fluid is easy as there will be a mark in the chamber showing at what level it should be, like the water level in the top of the radiator. It's the same with your car's tyres..... a quick look at the tread and the sidewall should hopefully not throw up any horrors - otherwise it might not just be you as the driver of a badly maintained car that gets hurt eh?

Holy shit bro, good thing you're still able to tell the story.

Lady luck's on your side! Go get a tattoo or something.

Glad to hear you're okay!

Glad you guys are ok.

Ive always known to check brake fluid. But I guess hanging out with dad in tha garage as a kid I learnt to do and check all kinds of stuff that you usualy wouldnt think of.

I would find the guy changing a flat who had to do a movie-style sideways dive and give him a Hallmark card. Do they make "sorry I almost ran you over, I was out of brake fluid, Happy Easter!" card?

yeah that shit is scary... its happened to me before, too. most recently in the truck im currently driving. if i had gone out of control in that, id prolly have caused some damage, too... its a '88 F150... heavy bastard

also: glad to hear you made it out ok

Do you drive an automatic? If you drive a manual another good way to slow down in that situation is to sort of pump-downshift. Like keep jumping down into lower gears... your car will sort of lurch, but it will also slow down and you can eventually get it to stop. It will, of course, fuck your transmission to hell. Or so I'm told.

Glad you're alright.

Cable brakes on a 32 Ford = no brake problems!!!!!!!

I crapped my pants reading that.

How is the dog?

I hope everyone here learns that a few quick checks are worthwhile.....

brake fluid doesn't just dissapear. hopefully the "shop" checked your wheel and master cylinders for leaks. I would be very leary of driving that vehicle till a brake specialist checked it out.