NEWS: A Horrible Dick Trap

POLITICS: A Horrible Dick Trap

The police in Columbus, Ohio have taken to using topless women as bait to trap perverts. Although, I have to say, if topless women are bait, then come and get me because I fucking love them. Please put bait everywhere. Although, I enjoy bottomless women even more.

That’s when the cops moved in and arrested Garrison. He was charged with public indecency and the police had a video to prove it. A video they were making of a half naked woman sitting in a park. Just some guys, sitting in a van, making a video of a topless woman in a park. Totally cool. Thank God they were able to catch some perverts. Luckily for them, Miss Topless was a woman who flirted with guys, made suggestive contact and then said, “Hey, can I see your cock?"

Now, one could say, “Sure, let’s go back to my house and you can not just see my cock, but use it like a horsey.” But when caught up in the heat of the moment, one could also remove ones cock from ones pants and let it taste sweet, sweet sunlight. I have taken my cock out in a public place for a woman and I am very thankful cops were not filming the event. I am also very thankful I took my cock out because magic events followed.

But why the hell were they there?

Hmmm, my little going after gay men alarm just went off. I noticed that sentence is lacking the “and women” part regarding sex. I guess they just got lucky with the naked lady.

Did not matter, Garrison was convicted. He has to stay away from naked lady park, pay a $250 fine, is on probation for a year and cannot cum for six months. Okay, maybe I made up that last part.

Garrison has not been fired from the fire department and hopefully it won’t happen. He is on desk duty, awaiting the results of an internal investigation about his exposed cock.

Police claim the naked lady sting operation is an effective way of lowering crime rates and stopping criminals before they do something really, really bad. I have some other possible stings. How about a young boy lying on a giant, soft bed, dressed in a Speedo? Just set the bed up in the park and see what happens. Or maybe two women could get under a blanket and eat each other out? In between moans, they could say, “Man, I just wish there was a cock around here.” I bet that would bring some of these criminals out of the woodwork. Also, a woman could dress up in a French Maid outfit and bend over a log, exposing her supple ass. Then when men walk by, she could say, “Oh, help, I’ve lost a ring in my vagina. Could you use your cock to find it?”

Any of these methods are available to law enforcement to catch perverts. Good luck, fellas.

No Asshole Fuckface Roundup this week kids. Jesus wouldn't allow it on his birthday.

If he was convicted by a jury then the people of Columbus, Ohio deserve an honorary
AHFF Award.

Dear Columbus Ohio,
What the fuck?!?!?!?

Yours Truly,
Oz

Holy shit.

thats really fuckin stupid. and what kind of girls enjoy volunteering for things like that?

So, where's the link to the video, eh? Is she hot?

How is a man pulling out his penis any more obscene than a woman lying around topless, in the eyes of the law? They're allowed to do that?

That's like walking down the street and seeing some guys smoking some crack. They're like, "Hey, man, wanna smoke some of this free crack that we are also smoking?" and you're like "Uhh... I guess," and then they tackle you like "You're under arrest, cracksmoker!"

What the fuck?!


Thank god we have the police to save us from the fornicators! Those filthy sinners should ROT IN HELL!!!!

it is getting to the point where a pervert just doesn't feel welcome any more

You obviously have had better luck when it come to dating than I do.

So it's legal for women to sunbathe topless in public parks in Columbus? I've gotta go there. I'll just have to remember not to take my cock out.

This is the very definition of entrapment.

I'm originally from Ohio and am now ashamed to be so. I've had my sports teams to shame me in the past, now I get law enforcement and the general public to help shame me as well for this entrapment and the bullshit conviction. Way to make Ohio proud assholes

This breaks my brain in so many ways. How is this not entrapment?

which just proves my theory that ohio is full of tards.

Naked Lady Park.

if i went to that park i'd be totally busted

If having sex with a topless lady in a park is wrong, then I don't want to be right.

I did some digging around, because I'm a firm believer that there's more to any story than you first hear.

Ummm. Nope. It is, in fact, that retarded.

Hehe. I said firm...

Topless sunbathing for both genders is legal in that park.

Women's breasts are not obscene. Breasts are breasts, no matter if you personally get sexually excited by a woman's chest and not a man's.

Quite a few places have been hit with gender discrimination lawsuits for allowing men to walk around topless but not women.

But yeah, this "sting" was really fucking stupid.

Yeah, I would totally agree with breasts not being obscene... I just figured the law was still about 50 years behind us. I didn't know there was any public place in America where women could be topless. Isn't it illegal to breastfeed most places?

wow

no girls saying "serves him right"??

if Catherine Zeta-Jones' skin-tight pants-clad, supple cavorting ass is entrapment, how does a topless lady manage to not be entrapment²?