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_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

DEC 09, 2007 12:14 AM





(Okay, so it's not Saturday. I couldn't get the site to work last night. Desculpa-me!)





People go on and on about how video games are bad for kids, turning them into ruthless killers and car thieves who like their coffee like they like their women: pixilated. And hot. Or something. But what about when video games save lives? I give you: Hans Jørgen Olsen. Yes, I know his name is totally awesome (although my friend Jeff says the vowel "ø" sounds horrendously ugly when spoken aloud), but more importantly is the fact that without the help of a certain beloved RPG, the only place left to marvel at that name might have been on a tombstone.



Hans Jørgen Olsen, a 12-year-old Norwegian boy, recently survived a moose attack by feigning death, "just like you learn at level 30 in World of Warcraft."





What kind of world are we living in that children are being attacked by a moose? What's next, flying squirrel kamikaze missions? On the other hand, it must be nice to live in a place where you can just stroll through a nearby forest with huge wintry animals roaming about. But I digress. So in the face of fearsome antler-wielding forest animals, this kid not only had the fortitude to take charge and get the moose away from his little sister (what a great brother!), but then to follow the lead of his Warcraft hunter character and drop like the dead, throwing his enemy off the track.



According to Norwegian site Nettavisen , Hans and his sister apparently enraged one of the local moose (mooses? meese?) during a walk in the forest near their home. After shouting at the gigantic creature to ward it away from his sister, Olsen dropped to the ground, and presumably his lifebar plummeted to zero.





Pure genius. Can you even imagine what kind of bloodbath might have gone down if the kid has been playing Mortal Kombat? Then again, that would change the story from "heart-warmingly quirky and showing a more productive side of video games" to "child goes crazy on forest animal and proves video game stereotypes right -- berserker!" So it's probably for the best that it didn't come to that.



As it does stand, this kid deserves some sort of medal. Bravery, heroism, and the right to get his WoW on for a little bit before digging into homework. Hey, after all, it's not like it never taught him anything.







_DictionaryGirl_ is saddened by the fact that, should she have found herself in a similar position, she would not have had the same brilliant options. Despite her best efforts, in real life she can neither cast arcane missiles nor turn enemies into sheep. She is also not sure what the benefits of turning a moose into a sheep might be.





DamienH

DamienH

United Kingdom
September 2003

DEC 09, 2007 05:26 AM

Shame I'm a big fan of GTA, I would have stolen the moose, shot a load of passers-by and had sex with a hooker... shame on me? Shame on that kid

Mankarlen

Mankarlen

Columbia City, OR
June 2006

DEC 09, 2007 05:59 AM

Then you would have a rabid sheep instead. which you would have to life tap to get rid of it. Go kid glad it worked!

CherryCoke

CherryCoke

North Conway, NH
May 2007

DEC 09, 2007 06:01 AM

Male moose are nasty.
And scary.
Especially during mating season.

SnowgodCCR

SnowgodCCR

Derry, NH
November 2006

DEC 09, 2007 06:03 AM

Fuck. This one time, I think I saw a moose that had been playing too much mortal kombat...I was driving down the road, and this moose wandered out and stopped and looked at me. It then proceeded to drop its antlers and feign a charge at us.

NoPantsDave

NoPantsDave

Cincinnati, OH
OLD SKOOL

DEC 09, 2007 06:15 AM

Moonrabbit

Moonrabbit

Kingston, ON
February 2005

DEC 09, 2007 06:15 AM

A bull moose is the most dangerous animal in north America. Way to go kiddo.
It's ironic that perhaps, someone who spent their free time training themselves physically would likely have been charged, outran and mashed up against a tree.
Where as the average WoW player, faced with this prospect would have no choice but to play dead and come out alive.

This is what I call a Fluke of natural selection. A loophole if you will.

Darke

Darke

Trego, WI
June 2005

DEC 09, 2007 06:33 AM

Moonrabbit said:
A bull moose is the most dangerous animal in north America. Way to go kiddo.



And, apparently, in Norway.

Jacob_Dodd

Jacob_Dodd

Cypress, TX
November 2007

DEC 09, 2007 07:32 AM

"Moosen....I saw a flock of Moosen."

Those things are dangerous. I hope I shall never come across one that isn't mounted on a wall with a corncob pipe stuck in his maw.

DannyDMc

DannyDMc

Fargo, ND
July 2003

DEC 09, 2007 07:43 AM



Moose are NASTY. A stray one wandered into the science building on my old campus one night, got trapped, and wrecked the place up pretty badly before cops came the next morning to put it down (I kid you not! I da good ol Upper Penninsula!)
Although not a WoW gamer by any means, I just want to say Congrats to that kid. He saved his sister's life AND it getting some major props from aroudn the world. Good for him!

thefreak

thefreak

NEWSWIRE

Gardner, MA

DEC 09, 2007 08:06 AM

That kid is badass. He will be knee deep in pussy. Norwegian pussy. MROWR!

-TM

wereduck

wereduck

I'm lost
July 2007

DEC 09, 2007 08:38 AM

Take that Joe Lieberman, Hilary Clinton, and Jack Thompson! Huzzah!

dEREKTheRed

dEREKTheRed

Monrovia, CA
January 2004

DEC 09, 2007 08:51 AM

Jacob_Dodd said:
"Moosen....I saw a flock of Moosen."



Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...

Awesome story. I personally would have deathcoiled and used my nifty pocketwatch in the hopes that I lost aggro before the speed boost wore off. The point of my post? Give warlocks feign death! surreal

xazapdmytinu

xazapdmytinu

Fort Collins, CO
July 2007

DEC 09, 2007 10:58 AM

thefreak said:
That kid is badass. He will be knee deep in pussy. Norwegian pussy. MROWR!

-TM



Norwegian Night Elf pussy.

tekniq7

tekniq7

I'm lost
July 2005

DEC 09, 2007 12:12 PM

dEREK_The_Red said:

Jacob_Dodd said:
"Moosen....I saw a flock of Moosen."



Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...

Awesome story. I personally would have deathcoiled and used my nifty pocketwatch in the hopes that I lost aggro before the speed boost wore off. The point of my post? Give warlocks feign death! surreal



Here Here! Warlock FD! Of course, as a warlock he could have just solo'd the moose...

xPenelopex

xPenelopex

Vancouver, BC
August 2006

DEC 09, 2007 12:39 PM

tekniq7 said:

Here Here! Warlock FD! Of course, as a warlock he could have just solo'd the moose...



Haha, it's a good thing he didn't roll a Lock!
He could have tried to get his sister to charm it blackeyed

Phantom_medic

Phantom_medic

Des Moines, IA
October 2007

DEC 09, 2007 02:20 PM

when WoW starts becoming actually useful in the real world.....im scared....

Ridley

Ridley

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

DEC 09, 2007 05:36 PM

dEREK_The_Red said:

Jacob_Dodd said:
"Moosen....I saw a flock of Moosen."



Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...



The meese want the foodin in the eatsenisit!

ardour

ardour

Ottawa, ON
March 2006

DEC 09, 2007 05:58 PM

I stopped playing WoW when I realized how many hours I was putting into it without really gaining anything. So this is funny.

Moonrabbit said:
This is what I call a Fluke of natural selection. A loophole if you will.



Well, it's survival of the fittest. Not survival of the strongest, weakest, smartest, dumbest.. etc. Whatever survives to keep on breeding. No loopholes.



Towelly

Towelly

I'm lost
January 2007

DEC 09, 2007 06:08 PM

creativename said:

dEREK_The_Red said:

Jacob_Dodd said:
"Moosen....I saw a flock of Moosen."



Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...



The meese want the foodin in the eatsenisit!



Thank you, Swedish Chef.



But in all honesty, awesome story. Wouldn't have quite worked out the same for me: I can't wtfbubblehearth in real life.


Lockeblade

Lockeblade

Australia
May 2007

DEC 09, 2007 06:59 PM

My google powers are failing me right now but I remember seeing photos of a scene where a moose crashed through the front window of this office. It'd severed a leg and cut itself up so badly and then charged around inside so much that there was blood and guts on the walls and ceiling of this office. It looked like my Warlock's Felguard went a few rounds with it.

Formus

Formus

Milwaukee, WI
May 2007

DEC 09, 2007 07:01 PM

"I'm Mr. T, and I'm a Knight Elf Mohawk."

Poe

Poe

SUICIDEGIRL

Texas, USA

DEC 09, 2007 09:47 PM

dEREK_The_Red said:
Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...

Awesome story. I personally would have deathcoiled and used my nifty pocketwatch in the hopes that I lost aggro before the speed boost wore off. The point of my post? Give warlocks feign death! surreal


As if warlocks aren't OP enough as is. L2play. tongue

minusthepenguin

minusthepenguin

Glenview, IL
August 2005

DEC 09, 2007 09:48 PM

I lol'ed. This story was actually my vent comment for a day. /nerd

scylis

scylis

Anchorage, AK
November 2004

DEC 10, 2007 02:13 AM

Poe said:

dEREK_The_Red said:
Was it out in the woodis? Or woodsen if you prefer...

Awesome story. I personally would have deathcoiled and used my nifty pocketwatch in the hopes that I lost aggro before the speed boost wore off. The point of my post? Give warlocks feign death! surreal


As if warlocks aren't OP enough as is. L2play. tongue



actually it looks like warlocks have been knocked down a bit thanks to 2.3. a lot of stuff breaks fear now, and there's still the trinket and such. i can't remember much of anything specific (i'm tired, sue me), but seems they're falling prey to rogues a lot more, now, at the very least. still really dangerous in skilled hands, but no longer auto-WIN anymore.

wait, i mean LESS QQ, MORE PEWPEW, dEREK_The_Red!

and i would have hit Evasion long enough for the sister to get away, then Vanished.

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