Current Events

TOPICS:

9/6/07

Previous

PAGE: 

1 ... 

31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35

 ... 428

Next

Previous

PAGE: 

1 | 2 | 3

Next

FearTheReaper

FearTheReaper

NEWSWIRE

I'm lost

AUG 27, 2007 12:32 AM





Sometimes when I read a news story I want to run outside and hug the first law enforcement officer I come across. After the hug, I would pull back and look deeply into those protecting eyes and says, "Thank you for saving my life and keeping me safe." This is one of those stories.



At 5 pm on Thursday in New Haven, Connecticut, police received a terrifying call reporting activity in an IKEA store parking lot.



Someone was sprinkling powder on the ground.



Holy shit! Have you ever heard of anything so fucking scary? When police arrived they discovered "powder connected by arrows and chalk." The police didn't take any chances and quickly evacuated the IKEA store. Their response saved the lives of many people - who are deathly allergic to flour.



Then one of the terrorists returned and the motherfucker was riding a bicycle. Daniel Salchow told police that he and his sister had sprinkled flour in the parking lot as part of a running trail for his goofy running club.



Salchow is a member of the Hash House Harriers, a worldwide group who enjoy drinking and running. The siblings were using the flour to create a complicated trail that was designed to confuse runners. The club has used flour to mark trails all across the country.



The city of New Haven now obviously had a situation on their hands. The local cops had evacuated an IKEA store because of flour in the parking lot. Not a pile of flour, but flour that was in the shape of arrows. Only a fucking moron would think it was a bio-weapon. The smart play here would be to acknowledge that it was a misunderstanding, maybe tell Salchow to inform the department in the future, and LET IT GO.



Unfortunately, Salchow and his sister were in the United States of America, where we have a long standing tradition of overreacting to ridiculous objects and claiming they are terrorist weapons. But New Haven wanted to surpass the duct tape alarm clock scare in Montrose and the circuit boards with lights panic in Boston. Salchow and his sister have been charged with first-degree breach of peace, which his a felony.



Great call, douche bags. The guy came back when he heard the store had been evacuated to explain the substance was only flour. He could have just gone home, cracked a beer an watched the idiot cops on the news. But he didn't. Salchow was a responsible man who did the right thing and now he faces a possible felony conviction. And now the world thinks the New Haven police department is full of fucking morons.



Mayoral spokeswoman Jessica Mayorga said the city plans to seek restitution from the Salchows.



"You see powder connected by arrows and chalk, you never know," she said. "It could be a terrorist, it could be something more serious. We're thankful it wasn't, but there were a lot of resources that went into figuring that out."



Actually, if you see powder connected by arrows and chalk, YOU DO KNOW. I advise the Mayor and local police not to attend any football games, because the fields are covered with bio-weapons. Also, I bake a hell of an anthrax sourdough loaf, if they want to know the difference.



ericwine

ericwine

Charlotte Hall, MD
January 2007

AUG 27, 2007 09:19 AM

What a bunch of idiots. At least Boston was reacting to electronic gadgets on bridges and buildings (though I still can't believe there wasn't even ONE Boston cop who recognized the Aqua Teen character).
(FTR, I'm surprised you're not gloating over the long overdue departure of Alberto Gonzales!)

Trahern

Trahern

United Kingdom
March 2003

AUG 27, 2007 09:25 AM

Charge the cops, not the kids. Good grief...

SirPsychoSexy

SirPsychoSexy

Ridgewood, NJ
January 2004

AUG 27, 2007 09:26 AM

"The Terrorists" have won.

FearTheReaper

FearTheReaper

NEWSWIRE

I'm lost

AUG 27, 2007 09:27 AM

ericwine said:
What a bunch of idiots. At least Boston was reacting to electronic gadgets on bridges and buildings (though I still can't believe there wasn't even ONE Boston cop who recognized the Aqua Teen character).
(FTR, I'm surprised you're not gloating over the long overdue departure of Alberto Gonzales!)



Dear God, this is the first I've heard of it. Guess I shouldn't go straight to SG when I wake up

ericwine

ericwine

Charlotte Hall, MD
January 2007

AUG 27, 2007 09:33 AM

FearTheReaper said:

ericwine said:
What a bunch of idiots. At least Boston was reacting to electronic gadgets on bridges and buildings (though I still can't believe there wasn't even ONE Boston cop who recognized the Aqua Teen character).
(FTR, I'm surprised you're not gloating over the long overdue departure of Alberto Gonzales!)



Dear God, this is the first I've heard of it. Guess I shouldn't go straight to SG when I wake up




Well, it's the first place I go when I log on, too... tongue
I just assumed you knew, or I'd have linked a news story.

SirPsychoSexy

SirPsychoSexy

Ridgewood, NJ
January 2004

AUG 27, 2007 09:34 AM

FearTheReaper said:

ericwine said:
What a bunch of idiots. At least Boston was reacting to electronic gadgets on bridges and buildings (though I still can't believe there wasn't even ONE Boston cop who recognized the Aqua Teen character).
(FTR, I'm surprised you're not gloating over the long overdue departure of Alberto Gonzales!)



Dear God, this is the first I've heard of it. Guess I shouldn't go straight to SG when I wake up



Short and short of it, A.G., the AG, sent an open letter to Bush resigning, then Bush went on TV and whined about how his buddy "Al" had his "good" name dragged through the mud.

InnocentSid

InnocentSid

Providence, RI
June 2007

AUG 27, 2007 09:56 AM

SirPsychoSexy said:
"The Terrorists" have won.


If we overreact to EVERYTHING SirPsychoSexy is right. And guess what ,we are the terrorists. We are scared shitless of our own shadow.

DarkSaiph

DarkSaiph

Taylor, MI
May 2007

AUG 27, 2007 10:11 AM

WTF

stem

stem

Kent, WA
January 2007

AUG 27, 2007 10:14 AM

Does this at least mean we can end bake sales?

SuicidePuppies

SuicidePuppies

Oakland, CA
June 2003

AUG 27, 2007 10:20 AM

disgusting.

marysmith

marysmith

Israel
April 2007

AUG 27, 2007 10:26 AM

FearTheReaper said:
Sometimes when I read a news story I want to run outside and hug the first law enforcement officer I come across. After the hug, I would pull back and look deeply into those protecting eyes and says, "Thank you for saving my life and keeping me safe." This is one of those stories.

At 5 pm on Thursday in New Haven, Connecticut, police received a terrifying call reporting activity in an IKEA store parking lot.


Someone was sprinkling powder on the ground.


Holy shit! Have you ever heard of anything so fucking scary? When police arrived they discovered "powder connected by arrows and chalk." The police didn't take any chances and quickly evacuated the IKEA store. Their response saved the lives of many people - who are deathly allergic to flour.

Then one of the terrorists returned and the motherfucker was riding a bicycle. Daniel Salchow told police that he and his sister had sprinkled flour in the parking lot as part of a running trail for his goofy running club.

Salchow is a member of the Hash House Harriers, a worldwide group who enjoy drinking and running. The siblings were using the flour to create a complicated trail that was designed to confuse runners. The club has used flour to mark trails all across the country.

The city of New Haven now obviously had a situation on their hands. The local cops had evacuated an IKEA store because of flour in the parking lot. Not a pile of flour, but flour that was in the shape of arrows. Only a fucking moron would think it was a bio-weapon. The smart play here would be to acknowledge that it was a misunderstanding, maybe tell Salchow to inform the department in the future, and LET IT GO.

Unfortunately, Salchow and his sister were in the United States of America, where we have a long standing tradition of overreacting to ridiculous objects and claiming they are terrorist weapons. But New Haven wanted to surpass the duct tape alarm clock scare in Montrose and the circuit boards with lights panic in Boston. Salchow and his sister have been charged with first-degree breach of peace, which his a felony.

Great call, douche bags. The guy came back when he heard the store had been evacuated to explain the substance was only flour. He could have just gone home, cracked a beer an watched the idiot cops on the news. But he didn't. Salchow was a responsible man who did the right thing and now he faces a possible felony conviction. And now the world thinks the New Haven police department is full of fucking morons.


Mayoral spokeswoman Jessica Mayorga said the city plans to seek restitution from the Salchows.

"You see powder connected by arrows and chalk, you never know," she said. "It could be a terrorist, it could be something more serious. We're thankful it wasn't, but there were a lot of resources that went into figuring that out."


Actually, if you see powder connected by arrows and chalk, YOU DO KNOW. I advise the Mayor and local police not to attend any football games, because the fields are covered with bio-weapons. Also, I bake a hell of an anthrax sourdough loaf, if they want to know the difference.



i was thinking DEATH BY YEAST INFECTION>>>>>>

bardsatyr

bardsatyr

Morrisville, NC
November 2006

AUG 27, 2007 10:29 AM

My god, they are SO right. It could have been much, much worse than terrorists.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)


It could have been hippies! With pot! <GASP!>

Zarth

Zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 27, 2007 10:40 AM

InnocentSid said:

SirPsychoSexy said:
"The Terrorists" have won.


If we overreact to EVERYTHING SirPsychoSexy is right. And guess what ,we are the terrorists. We are scared shitless of our own shadow.


That's something that's disgusted me for a long time. The Soviets were scary. They had the power to destroy all human life. Osama bin Laden is not scary. He doesn't have to unhook himself from a dialysis machine.

What the fuck have we come to as a country?

Vestril

Vestril

Coronado, CA
February 2003

AUG 27, 2007 10:50 AM

Trahern said:
Charge the cops, not the kids. Good grief...



Just to be clear, these weren't kids.

KIPirate

KIPirate

Kelleys Island, OH
October 2002

AUG 27, 2007 11:21 AM

The funny thing is, most of the Hashers I have known were military folks...

It started way back in the day with the Brits, but I think most of the US hashing was imported from US soldiers coming back from Korea, where running and drinking were some of the only safe forms of entertainment/fitness...

Way to screw the little people because you are inept, New Haven PD.

KI ARRR!!!

OneWithAll

OneWithAll

Charlton City, MA
October 2005

AUG 27, 2007 11:48 AM

*claps sarcastically*

good job men

Jace

Jace

Reno, NV
February 2004

AUG 27, 2007 12:13 PM

Sigh.

If the TV media and the stupid TV zombie consumer whores who watch it can let one terrorist attack six years ago drive the nation into such a fear-ridden stupor that we arrest people for sprinkling flour on the ground, or hanging up some unusual signs, then the terrorists have truly won.

gg, America.

zoophagous

zoophagous

USA
November 2006

AUG 27, 2007 12:21 PM

They are morons......Seek restitution?
What exactly is restitution for being an idiot?

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

AUG 27, 2007 12:31 PM

I am imagining the terrorists planning their next attack. Sort of like Clue.

"In Albuquerque, at JC Penny's, with corn starch."

Clidna

Clidna

Emo, ON
January 2005

AUG 27, 2007 12:40 PM

...but there were a lot of resources that went into figuring that out."



And sadly, they still didn't figure it out... the kid had to come back and tell them.
whatever

Totally lame.

Gerry_D

Gerry_D

Los Angeles, CA
May 2003

AUG 27, 2007 12:57 PM

i liked cops and prosecutors better when they used to be smart-ish.

CherryCoke

CherryCoke

Bretton Woods, NH
May 2007

AUG 27, 2007 01:35 PM

I don't have a problem with the fact that they evacuated the store since they didn't know what the substance was.
I find it a little ridiculous to charge the people though. It's not like they were even planning a prank.

Zarth

Zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 27, 2007 01:42 PM

NickFaust said:
I am imagining the terrorists planning their next attack. Sort of like Clue.

"In Albuquerque, at JC Penny's, with corn starch."


We are living in the best of all possible worlds, my friend.

Vestril

Vestril

Coronado, CA
February 2003

AUG 27, 2007 01:48 PM

Gerry_D said:
i liked cops and prosecutors better when they used to be smart-ish.



When was this?

Clidna said:

...but there were a lot of resources that went into figuring that out."



And sadly, they still didn't figure it out... the kid had to come back and tell them.
whatever

Totally lame.



Also, NOT KIDS; these people were in their 30's. It's still a dumb overreaction but it's not against little kids. It's against fully adult Germans.

Previous

PAGE: 

1 | 2 | 3

Next