NEWS: Alberto Gonzalez Is Possessed By A Clowntard

POLITICS: Alberto Gonzalez Is Possessed By A Clowntard

Alberto Gonzalez testified in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee on Tuesday. I now know why someone decided to put the work “fucking” in the middle of the word “unbelievable.” It was truly unfuckingbelievable. Many idiots have served in high-level positions in our government over the years, but I think we have finally found the dumbest man out of all those idiots.

Gonzalez lied, denied and babbled his way through the questioning. It would be considered a disgraceful performance for a plumber. As Attorney General of the United States it was so pathetic that he should have gone home, put a shotgun between his teeth and pulled the trigger. No one would have blamed him.

Gonzalez acted like a man who is not in charge of the Justice Department with many of the questions he answered. For example, when Senator Whitehouse expressed great concern that the Vice President was being informed about Department of Justice investigations.

Yes! It’s a great fucking question and you are actually in charge of the department, which means you are the man responsible. That means you’re supposed to take responsibility and answer it. If you don’t take responsibility, then you should come up with a clever answer or a smart, lawyer-like denial of some sort. What you should not say is; “Good question,” or “Hey, that’s nifty,” or “How about that?” or "Boo Ya!" It makes me, an American, feel a deep horror that someone as stupid as you could be in charge of the Department of Justice.

That was just one of the many idiotic moments provided by the Attorney General. Here the clown went mano-a-mano with Senator Schumer.



Nice going, fuckface. You just broke the law. Gonzalez did not assert privilege, he did not say he could not remember, he just refused to answer the question. The Attorney General of the United States just broke the law.

Anyone see a problem with the AG blatantly breaking the law? What about just being an idiot?

Nope. The US Attorney scandal broke in March but Gonzalez still has not done any research to find out why he fired the people he fired. He should sit himself down and ask himself some questions because he is making himself look like an idiot. At the very least he should call himself to check in and catch up.

Gonzalez was also caught in a blatant lie when he was questioned about an emergency meeting with Congressional leaders, known as the "Gang of 8," on March 10, 2004. Gonzalez was counsel to Bush at the time and briefed the “Gang of 8” about the warrantless eavesdropping program. But on Tuesday, Gonzalez repeatedly claimed he did not discuss the surveillance program in the meeting. Instead, he says the meeting was about another intelligence program that he can’t talk about. A super-duper secret program. It's so secret, he might not even have told himself.

Man, that would be a great story if it were true. So far, "Gang of 8" members Senator Jay Rockefeller, Senator Tom Daschle, Representative Jane Harmon and Representative Nancy Pelosi have all stated that Gonzalez’s claim is false. All four say Gonzalez only spoke of the surveillance program and a memo from the national intelligence director’s office supports their claim.

So, on one side, four Congressional lawmakers who are supported by an intelligence document, and on the other side, a complete idiot. I'm going with the latter. It's not like it's the first time that Alberto lied to Congress. Just two weeks ago, Gonzalez was caught lying about his knowledge of the FBI abusing anti-terrorism laws.

For a lawyer to behave in such a manner is astounding. It is incomprehensible for the Attorney General. There are two reasons Bush would keep this complete and total moron on the job. Either he wants someone who comes across as more pathetic than he is, or he can’t let Gonzalez go because of all the dirty secrets he is hiding. Congress should impeach Gonzalez, convict him of contempt and he should be disbarred.

I rather suspect that Gonzalez's incompetence is at least partially a cultivated one, to avoid being pinned with wrongdoing. After all, if he came up with smart lawyerly replies, that would imply he knew what he was doing and was definitely hiding something. However, as a pure idiot, there's a chance that Congress will just throw its hands up in disgust and never find out what it needs to know.

Not that I really think the guy is that smart. It's probably more like a serendipitous synergy of strategy and stupidity.

Reagan did the same thing when he got nailed on Iran/Contra. And it worked.

fuck yeah, a complete absolute MORON. I hate him.

Gonzales may be more uniformly despised across the political spectrum than Bush, since even conservatives loathe him. At best, he's frightfully incompetent, which is par for the course in an Administration that values loyalty to the president above party, country or simple decency.
Schumer is one of the biggest horse's asses in the Senate, but he's on target here.

Anyone else notice that everyone asking 'Berto questions glared condescendingly over their reading glasses with much the same expression Zarth has in his profile picture?

I want reading glasses.

Misunderstand Hamlet is a sin.

I almost wish we had the REAL Gonzo as our AG...

Oscar, Oscar, give the man an Oscar for crs sake.
This is so obviously a rehearsed act.
All the while King Geroge does as he pleases and WE the citizens of the US can do nothing.
I'd like to suggest that someone with at least a high school education in the Bush Administration sit them all down and read them the Declaration of Independence and then ask them why they are trying to force a second American Revolution. It seems to me that the Bushies are deliberately doing what they are doing to force and American insurection so that King George can can assume all the
"Emergency" powers he has granted himself.
Long Live the King

hahahahaha

Bean, for this clip alone, I apologize for every thread I've ever been involved in that ended with you saying 'for fuck's sake people' (or something similar) before it was locked.

I almost don't want to get my hopes up that anything will come of it, though.

I know they're never supposed to apologize for anything, but even the right wing might want to take a closer look at a couple of things here...HE BROKE THE LAW!!! CHARGE HIM WITH SOME SHIT!!! The right wing in this country are like all those assholes who bought Creed's albums; millions of copies were sold, but you can't get one fucking person to admit that they actually purchased it...

Yes, he is. Karl Rove has been subpoenaed too, so this is a banner day - at least on the face of things.

I still wish these people had some modicum of respect for our country, and hadn't seen fit to screw us in the first place.

I was hoping they would not do this, simply because it could drag on until near the end of Bush's term. I was hoping they would go for impeachment, but maybe the know they will never get the votes.

Now get ready for the poor Christian Right using this as a "they're persecuting us" cause.

Gonzales is a disgrace. I feel embarrassed for him when he speaks even though I know he is too daft to be embarrassed for himself. I suspect he thinks he is quite the crafty wordsmith. I agree that his position is partially cultivated and partially just the dumb luck of a dumb fuck, but either way this whole scandal (hell, administration) has been a monumental waste of time and energy! Of couse Bush loves him ~ the AG is a great distraction from the general fuckery in other areas AND takes up enough time to keep the Dems from other legislative business ~ what's not to love? The only credit I can give him is that he does not seem like pure evil while others in (or now out) of the administration do. I hope the special prosecuter investigation does something, but I'm not particularly optimistic about it.

-TM

not that it matters, but Gonzalez voice sounds like Charlie Sheen after being smacked in the balls.

Good point. If Gonzales were to 'sing' anything like John Ashcroft did, there would be great cause for grief (as if there isn't enough already)...

I dunno. He doesn't seem dumb to me, he just seems like an unethical, immoral, lying scumbag yes-man, who's sitting through these hearings only because he can't get out of them. He's not going to confirm or deny anything, he's trying not to give anyone any firepower or leverage to allow them to come down on him or even to come to any real conclusions. He's crafting his answers so that he can say he answered the question when he's asked about it, and criticize the members of the committee for being obstructionists, or whatever it is he wants to call them, but in reality he's neither confirmed, denied, or implicated anyone: "I was there on behalf of the President" is a good example.

Bush and his entourage have to keep up appearances, especially when it's televised. They can push through whatever executive orders they want, because I'd be willing to wager most of the country won't hear about it, or care if they do. But if it's on C-SPAN that's a TV channel! Gotta keep up appearances on the magical picture box that everyone sits around all day and all night.

this is almost as bad as the time he censored those benni/apnea sets.
at least that's all behind us now.

For confusing developments like these, I find clarity in the reporting of America's Finest News Source.

What do you mean he's "possessed by" a clowntard?

Way to let him off the hook, FTR.

"May the lights in The Land of Plenty, shine on the truth some day."

karl rove is wiping his ass with that subpoena even as we speak.