zort

We had planned for her to come on Sunday, stay till Monday (today) and have a cute/sweet time together. So my Friday was spent cleaning up around here, my room, bathroom and spare room where she would be staying (still live with the parents, they have rules/conditions if she stays for the night. I still broke them)
Saturday was my day in Hamilton to visit my friends, many of whom I haven't seen since the trip to Seattle back in August. Of course Alyssa and I were texting back and forth, obviously both anxious to see each other. She wanted to meet sooner and told me to get back to Milton, which at the time wasn't really a possibility. Which I explained to my friends, and was in turn surprised to hear
"Is she in Toronto right now? Like at Union station?"
'Yeah, she wants me to get back to Milton so we can meet up sooner than tomorrow'
"Why doesn't she come here? That way if the weather turns to shit you won't be late to meet her."
'Seriously? That's cool with you guys? I don't want to just invite someone you don't know over to someone elses house if it's not cool'
So the plan went into effect, and she hopped on the bus to Hamilton. I was obviously excited and it showed. I had begun to pace back and forth, constantly looking out the balcony window to the GO station below. After my nerves began to settle back down some more and was halfway through my dinner (double cheeseburger pizza with lots of garlic dipping sauce ftw) my phone rang, she was in Hamilton and was just waiting to get to the station. Gave me the intersection she had just passed which I relayed to my friends and they told me she'd still be a few minutes. By the time that had been fully said, I had already put my shoes and coat on, whilst still clutching my phone, drinking her voice in. The time came, I borrowed the keys and ran as fast as I could. Paced in the elevator in the vain hopes of getting it from 11 to G faster. Down some stairs and out to the station I glanced around for a moment and finally locked my eyes on her.
I didn't let go of her that night. Having her next to me, hand in hand. I felt alive. We got back here around 3 am, and didn't sleep till much later.
Saturday was more of the same, we watched Zack and Miri Make A Porno, some Metalocalypse and finally Dr. Horrible's Singalong Blog. Went out for dinner and generally had a great time. Slight hiccup in the alone time later on that night led to a good conversation about us. She told me that she cares for me and was so happy to have someone like me who was willing to take her for who she is and be there to care for her no matter what her situation was. She had also mentioned the fact that even though we have ended up with so many different people in the near 4 years we've known each other, we always end up back with one another. I took the opportunity to lay it all out and tell her how I felt about her. She thought it was sweet, but I hadn't quite been able to convey the message to her.

"I want to show you something." I opened up to SG and showed her my blog entries. The ones dating back to 2006. Each and every entry that I had mentioned her in. We ended up having the kind of honest and open conversation about things that i'd needed to hear since we met. There is now a much better understanding between us, and it's looking like i've actually got a good chance to finally be with her.

I can now say that I love her. She's only been gone for 3 hours and I don't know what to do with myself. I didn't want to let her go. When she got on the bus I instantly missed her. I don't know yet when i'll get to see her again, but i'm already eager for it. My stomach is still fluttering, and my head is in the clouds.