rather liberating....
so, i was starting to get back together with an ex from waaaaaaaayyyyyy back...fuck was i thinking in the first place? (oh yeah! lack of sex!!) at least i learned something this time around: being treated like shit, and letting the person get away with it is a no-go anymore. i rarely lose my cool and yell at the people close to me..i mean, almost never. when we broke up like 16 years ago, i was calm and collected (on the outside at least) not this time...i think i'd just had enough. seriously...intentionally doing things you KNOW will hurt someone, i mean...why the fuck would you do that? because you know they'll sit there and take it i guess....well, i didn't the next time i spoke to her. like, the straw that broke the camel's back. it was quite a liberating feeling for whatever reason...i think because even though i lost my cool, raised my voice, and spoke my mind, i was well aware of what i was saying, and did it without being mean or vindictive, and severed a nearly 20 year wasted friendship. i guess i should still be mad, but i'm like fucking relieved and happy about it. i don't know...i must sound like a dick without hearing the whole story, but whatever. i'm feeling good, and promised myself i won't be anyone's shitbox anymore.
go me!!!
(hmmmm...and i'm not even feeling like "at least we could have fucked before this all happened." that kinda worries me...hahaaaa)
so, i was starting to get back together with an ex from waaaaaaaayyyyyy back...fuck was i thinking in the first place? (oh yeah! lack of sex!!) at least i learned something this time around: being treated like shit, and letting the person get away with it is a no-go anymore. i rarely lose my cool and yell at the people close to me..i mean, almost never. when we broke up like 16 years ago, i was calm and collected (on the outside at least) not this time...i think i'd just had enough. seriously...intentionally doing things you KNOW will hurt someone, i mean...why the fuck would you do that? because you know they'll sit there and take it i guess....well, i didn't the next time i spoke to her. like, the straw that broke the camel's back. it was quite a liberating feeling for whatever reason...i think because even though i lost my cool, raised my voice, and spoke my mind, i was well aware of what i was saying, and did it without being mean or vindictive, and severed a nearly 20 year wasted friendship. i guess i should still be mad, but i'm like fucking relieved and happy about it. i don't know...i must sound like a dick without hearing the whole story, but whatever. i'm feeling good, and promised myself i won't be anyone's shitbox anymore.
go me!!!
(hmmmm...and i'm not even feeling like "at least we could have fucked before this all happened." that kinda worries me...hahaaaa)