FEMINISM
-If You Want Equal Rights, Be a Pallbearer-
People have actually said that to me. This is the absurd ad nauseum "Pallbearer Clause" I often get when I start talking feminism, and it's completely ridiculous.
How would you like to be told that, in order to have equal rights, you must be able to do something that you physically cannot do?
Say you're a man. Now, say somebody tells you that in order to be respected and taken seriously, you must be able to lift ten tons with your bare hands. Absurd, isn't it? No matter how hard you tried or how much iron you pumped, you'd never be able to lift ten tons-- your body was just not designed to do it. Why, then, should your physical capabilities be used to determine your status as a human being? The excuse that equality would demand that you do things you're physically unable to do is silly. A person in a wheelchair can't physically RUN, but that doesn't give anyone the right to reduce or limit their freedom, dignity, or opportunities in life.
So why is it okay to do it to women?
I cannot lift large, heavy things. I cannot fight someone who is larger and stronger than me. And I'm not asking to. I'm asking for the right to do anything I'm physically capable of, regardless of my gender.
-Why Do We Vote For Them?-
People may say "All politicians are corrupt", but they never say "All MEN are corrupt", even though the majority of people in power (in any country) are men. No one blames their incompetence or lies on their gender. Women, however, are always blamed for being women, as if gender only relates to competence when it's the female gender. (One would think if the statement "All politicians are corrupt" had truth to it, and if most politicians are men, we'd stop voting for them. But we don't.) If a male politician screws up in any way, people shrug and say, "What do you expect from politicians?"
If a female politician screws up, people shrug and say, "What do you expect from women?"
-You Girls Have it So Good-
It's often pointed out to me that one of our "female priveleges" is that we don't have to worry about being drafted-- no one expects a girl to go to war and fight. Like, with guns. Like the men do. It's always implied that we'd really regret it if equality dropped down on us Tomorrow and we were suddenly expected to do Real Mens' Work. But think about this: If equality were instituted tomorrow, do you REALLY think there'd be as much war? If all were suddenly made equal, we'd have an equal number of FEMALE politicians, advisors, and thinkers who would oppose war.
However, if you believe humanity to be so war-like that we'd continue waging war anyway... Well, women wouldn't object to serving then, would they? If we're just as vicious as the men, then nothing will change. There are lots of men who do not want to go to war. Not all of them can be written off as cowards. Many simply do not think war is right, and if you started drafting women tomorrow, you'd have a great many more objectors on your hands. Not because we're scared we'll break a nail on an AK-47, but because many of us think there are alternatives to fighting.
If 50% of our government were female, do you really think a majority of them would be war-mongerers?
I'm tired of being told that if women had equality, they wouldn't want it, as if being treated as an equal member of the human race is too much to put on our frail shoulders. Female privelege? I'm not seeing much advantage to it. Sure, there are women who exploit the "helpless, giddy female" image for all it's worth. In any time or place, you're going to find people who are content with the status quo. In the days of slavery, there were no doubt slaves here and there who were content with their lot in life and had no real ambition to be free. But that doesn't mean that slavery was okay, or that it shouldn't have been rebelled against. Thus it is with women-- sure, many may be happy taking advantage of the system we've already got.
That doesn't make it OKAY to deny the rest of us our rights.
-I Didn't Make the Rules, I Just Live By Them-
"I can't change the world" is not a reason to do nothing. It's like saying "I can't wash all the dishes in existence, so I'll wash none." Pitiful excuse. Admittedly, you probably CAN'T wash ALL dishes-- but you can always wash your OWN.
Thus it is with change-- maybe you can't change the whole world, but you can always change yourself. And aren't you a PART of the world?
Hey, one less dirty dish is still one less dirty dish.
-You'd Reap the Benefits, Too-
If equality came tomorrow it would benefit men, too. Imagine no longer having to worry about acting/dressing/speaking masculinely at all times for fear of being considered "womanish" or "gay". If men and women were truly equal, and women were no longer looked down upon, no one would deride a man who is seen to be "too feminine", because there would be nothing considered weak or wrong about femaleness.
Wouldn't that be great? There'd no longer be a struggle to keep up the "appearance" of being what you already are-- MALE.
-I'm Not One of Those Feminists!-
I'm always apalled by women who say "I'm not a feminist", as if they don't dare associate themselves with them there troublemakin', sass-talkin', pants-wearin' harpies. To you I ask-- What exactly do you think feminism IS?
I'm not talking about blurring the genders into one big grey mass of sameness. I'm not talking about outlawing skirts and lipstick (as if clothes are the real issue; if putting women in pants were the solution to inequality, we'd have won the war through Levi's ads long ago). It's especially not about hating men or putting them down as inferior, because they're not.
BEING A FEMINIST MEANS BELIEVING THAT ALL PEOPLE SHOULD BE TREATED WITH EQUAL RESPECT AND DIGNITY ON THE BASIS OF THEIR HUMANITY, NOT THE BASIS OF THEIR GENDER.
Equal pay for equal work. No more sexual objectification. Being treated as an intelligent, rational person with a thinking, feeling mind instead of like a prize to be sought after or a child to be taken care of.
Girls, what are you finding wrong with that?
-Give Us A Chance-
Imagine you're standing somewhere, watching someone do a very bad job at putting together a model. They're making mistakes, there's glue everywhere, and you're pretty sure that they've glued the deck of the Enterprise on upside-down.
"Let me try," you say, thinking that maaaaybe you can do a better job.
"NO," says the other. "I know I'm messing it up, but I know before you even start that you won't do any better."
This is kind of what it feels like to be a woman, and to be told you'd be no more skilled (or maybe even less so!) even though you've never been given the opportunity to try.
-It's Nothing Personal-
I do not hate men. I do not wish to see them "put down" or treated the way women have been treated for thousands of years. That might make a nice little revenge fantasy, but it wouldn't make a good world, for men OR for women. I just want things to be equal, so that we're all starting from the same place on the board. Wouldn't that be better for men, too? After all, you can't feel very proud when you only win the races that let you have a head-start.
So stop telling me that I don't really want gender equality. Stop telling me that I should be happy with my "female privelege". We are not afraid of responsibility. We are not afraid to pull our own weight. If tomorrow brings equality, I'm not going to be crying over the fact that people are no longer obliged to open doors for me.
I can open my own goddamned doors.
-If You Want Equal Rights, Be a Pallbearer-
People have actually said that to me. This is the absurd ad nauseum "Pallbearer Clause" I often get when I start talking feminism, and it's completely ridiculous.
How would you like to be told that, in order to have equal rights, you must be able to do something that you physically cannot do?
Say you're a man. Now, say somebody tells you that in order to be respected and taken seriously, you must be able to lift ten tons with your bare hands. Absurd, isn't it? No matter how hard you tried or how much iron you pumped, you'd never be able to lift ten tons-- your body was just not designed to do it. Why, then, should your physical capabilities be used to determine your status as a human being? The excuse that equality would demand that you do things you're physically unable to do is silly. A person in a wheelchair can't physically RUN, but that doesn't give anyone the right to reduce or limit their freedom, dignity, or opportunities in life.
So why is it okay to do it to women?
I cannot lift large, heavy things. I cannot fight someone who is larger and stronger than me. And I'm not asking to. I'm asking for the right to do anything I'm physically capable of, regardless of my gender.
-Why Do We Vote For Them?-
People may say "All politicians are corrupt", but they never say "All MEN are corrupt", even though the majority of people in power (in any country) are men. No one blames their incompetence or lies on their gender. Women, however, are always blamed for being women, as if gender only relates to competence when it's the female gender. (One would think if the statement "All politicians are corrupt" had truth to it, and if most politicians are men, we'd stop voting for them. But we don't.) If a male politician screws up in any way, people shrug and say, "What do you expect from politicians?"
If a female politician screws up, people shrug and say, "What do you expect from women?"
-You Girls Have it So Good-
It's often pointed out to me that one of our "female priveleges" is that we don't have to worry about being drafted-- no one expects a girl to go to war and fight. Like, with guns. Like the men do. It's always implied that we'd really regret it if equality dropped down on us Tomorrow and we were suddenly expected to do Real Mens' Work. But think about this: If equality were instituted tomorrow, do you REALLY think there'd be as much war? If all were suddenly made equal, we'd have an equal number of FEMALE politicians, advisors, and thinkers who would oppose war.
However, if you believe humanity to be so war-like that we'd continue waging war anyway... Well, women wouldn't object to serving then, would they? If we're just as vicious as the men, then nothing will change. There are lots of men who do not want to go to war. Not all of them can be written off as cowards. Many simply do not think war is right, and if you started drafting women tomorrow, you'd have a great many more objectors on your hands. Not because we're scared we'll break a nail on an AK-47, but because many of us think there are alternatives to fighting.
If 50% of our government were female, do you really think a majority of them would be war-mongerers?
I'm tired of being told that if women had equality, they wouldn't want it, as if being treated as an equal member of the human race is too much to put on our frail shoulders. Female privelege? I'm not seeing much advantage to it. Sure, there are women who exploit the "helpless, giddy female" image for all it's worth. In any time or place, you're going to find people who are content with the status quo. In the days of slavery, there were no doubt slaves here and there who were content with their lot in life and had no real ambition to be free. But that doesn't mean that slavery was okay, or that it shouldn't have been rebelled against. Thus it is with women-- sure, many may be happy taking advantage of the system we've already got.
That doesn't make it OKAY to deny the rest of us our rights.
-I Didn't Make the Rules, I Just Live By Them-
"I can't change the world" is not a reason to do nothing. It's like saying "I can't wash all the dishes in existence, so I'll wash none." Pitiful excuse. Admittedly, you probably CAN'T wash ALL dishes-- but you can always wash your OWN.
Thus it is with change-- maybe you can't change the whole world, but you can always change yourself. And aren't you a PART of the world?
Hey, one less dirty dish is still one less dirty dish.
-You'd Reap the Benefits, Too-
If equality came tomorrow it would benefit men, too. Imagine no longer having to worry about acting/dressing/speaking masculinely at all times for fear of being considered "womanish" or "gay". If men and women were truly equal, and women were no longer looked down upon, no one would deride a man who is seen to be "too feminine", because there would be nothing considered weak or wrong about femaleness.
Wouldn't that be great? There'd no longer be a struggle to keep up the "appearance" of being what you already are-- MALE.
-I'm Not One of Those Feminists!-
I'm always apalled by women who say "I'm not a feminist", as if they don't dare associate themselves with them there troublemakin', sass-talkin', pants-wearin' harpies. To you I ask-- What exactly do you think feminism IS?
I'm not talking about blurring the genders into one big grey mass of sameness. I'm not talking about outlawing skirts and lipstick (as if clothes are the real issue; if putting women in pants were the solution to inequality, we'd have won the war through Levi's ads long ago). It's especially not about hating men or putting them down as inferior, because they're not.
BEING A FEMINIST MEANS BELIEVING THAT ALL PEOPLE SHOULD BE TREATED WITH EQUAL RESPECT AND DIGNITY ON THE BASIS OF THEIR HUMANITY, NOT THE BASIS OF THEIR GENDER.
Equal pay for equal work. No more sexual objectification. Being treated as an intelligent, rational person with a thinking, feeling mind instead of like a prize to be sought after or a child to be taken care of.
Girls, what are you finding wrong with that?
-Give Us A Chance-
Imagine you're standing somewhere, watching someone do a very bad job at putting together a model. They're making mistakes, there's glue everywhere, and you're pretty sure that they've glued the deck of the Enterprise on upside-down.
"Let me try," you say, thinking that maaaaybe you can do a better job.
"NO," says the other. "I know I'm messing it up, but I know before you even start that you won't do any better."
This is kind of what it feels like to be a woman, and to be told you'd be no more skilled (or maybe even less so!) even though you've never been given the opportunity to try.
-It's Nothing Personal-
I do not hate men. I do not wish to see them "put down" or treated the way women have been treated for thousands of years. That might make a nice little revenge fantasy, but it wouldn't make a good world, for men OR for women. I just want things to be equal, so that we're all starting from the same place on the board. Wouldn't that be better for men, too? After all, you can't feel very proud when you only win the races that let you have a head-start.
So stop telling me that I don't really want gender equality. Stop telling me that I should be happy with my "female privelege". We are not afraid of responsibility. We are not afraid to pull our own weight. If tomorrow brings equality, I'm not going to be crying over the fact that people are no longer obliged to open doors for me.
I can open my own goddamned doors.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I do have to disagree with one point, though:
... If equality were instituted tomorrow, do you REALLY think there'd be as much war? ... If 50% of our government were female, do you really think a majority of them would be war-mongerers? ...
Yes, I do believe there would be as much war. I think those statements speak to a rather hurtful stereotype that men are more warlike and vicious than women. "The gentler sex" is unfair to the many men out there who are against war, fighting, etc. I believe the percentage of women who can be combative, vengeful, petty, and warmongering is the same as the percentage of men with those traits.
And if, as you say, "all politicians are corrupt", then, even if 50% of them were women, they would still be politicians. I don't believe that changing the ratio of men to women in government would necessarily change the ratio of warmongers to peaceniks. I've known many women who are staunch Republicans, who are still fully in favor of the war in Iraq, and George W. Bush.
As far as equality goes, having an equal number of men and women in a specific industry, i.e., government, finance, IT, salon ownership, etc., isn't necessary to equality. In many cases, the variance in the number of men and women working in a specific field is more due to interest level than anything else.
From my personal experience in the IT field, any woman enough of a computer geek to want to work in tech support or networking is pretty much guaranteed a job - provided she's qualified. Or maybe just enthusiastic. Most guys I know in the field would be more than happy to have a woman to work alongside with, and being geeks ourselves, we know it's all about the know-how. The women I have worked with in IT have all been equally respected for their abilities, and treated, at least by their male coworkers, the same as any other geek. Even so, it seems that there is only one female computer geek for every ten or twenty male ones out there.
I don't know if this is a symptom of the inequalites in our society, or if it simply a difference of interest. I suspect the latter. There do seem to be some things that men, or women, are more interested in. As long as there are no artificial barriers to someone's entry into a field, barriers based on gender, then I don't see a problem with there being an uneven distribution in the workforce.
Anyway, I've rambled on a bit, but I think your article was very well thought out and very well written. And I would hold the door open for you if I got there first. But, if you got to it first, I would expect you to hold it for me.