I'm so glad the blog homework from @missy @rambo and @lyxzen this week is how to deal with haters. The topic of haters is one that I think comes up A LOT for anyone who puts themselves out there in any way, shape or form, but baring all on the internet has definitely brought it's share of hate my way. People LOVE controversy, and what's more controversial than a woman who does what she wants? Especially one who gets nude and proudly displays her confidence, not for praise or sexual advances, but for freedom of expression? I do this because I know that when I'm 50 and having a hard time getting around on my own, I can look back and say "God damn. I had some rowdy times. My life has been good and I did what I wanted without letting society stop me."
I've talked before on blogs about my disorder and how it's always made me a little "different", and that I love myself BECAUSE of those differences and not in spite of them. For a long time though, when I became aware of people "throwing shade" my way, I'd always try to confront them; to teach them why they were wrong. It didn't take long for me to learn that that's the EXACT reaction that pot stirrers are seeking, and not only was I giving them fuel, it was costing ME energy. So one day I just decided to stop. Stop confronting, stop acknowledging, stop even seeing or hearing the hate. It was hard at first not to at least let it nibble at me, but now I literally don't see it. Literally. Example: My sister and I were walking down a busy street in NoVA, and she just stopped and grabbed my hand and looked in my eyes and said "How do you do it? How do you walk around covered in tattoos with purple hair and deal with everyone staring at you ALL THE TIME?" And I was like "What? Who is staring at me?" and she said "Literally everyone you walk past."... I just don't notice. It's important for me to live and let live, and others actions happen deep enough in my periphery that I don't. even. notice. Some may call it self-absorbed, but I call it the secret to success.
It also happens to be the reason I got these tattoos
Haters/Hecklers pay admission to your show. They sit in a box and shout stuff that you can hardly hear, while you stand in the spotlight and do what makes you shine. At the end of the night, they go home to their normal boring lives and are bitter (and out the cost of admission!) Meanwhile you are a few bucks richer, more experienced, and on the path to happiness.
You do you babe, and as Lorde says, "Let em talk".
