Well this is my own response or possibly an explanation to the video I posted this morning at 5am.
As a child I loved the stars. Growing up where I did, in the middle of no where, there was nothing brighter at night than the heavens. I felt a strange attraction to them, they were always there, unmoving, unchanging. A constant in my life I could always count on. I knew that every day as the sun set they would be there. I would love to sit for hours and stare at this white speckled purple band stretching across the sky. I started reading as much as I could on them. I was 15 and reading books like Cosmos, A Brief History of Time, The Dragons of Eden. When I was young it was great to soak up this knowledge. It just fed more fuel onto the fire that powered my dreams.
As I've gotten older my love for the view of the stars that fill our night sky has only grown. But my passion for the understanding of them has not. Maybe it is my heightened sense of social awareness, maybe a better understanding of myself, or maybe it is just me coming to terms with my fears. Now when I analyze the sky with the knowledge I've accumulated my awe is turned into a new and strange feeling. I can't help but feel tiny, like a grain of sand being whisked away by a turbulent river. We are bombarded daily by the atrocities of the world we live in, which seems to be growing by the minute. I see the suffering and the joys of the world and then I look up. I am overwhelmed by this feeling of what does it all matter? We have people killing each other in the name of their god, we have people starving while others sit on piles of unused wealth and a million other injustices. Then I am reminded of my own mortality. Thoughts that echo to me that I won't be here forever. In a hundred years that star will still be shining down on this spot where I am. Will there be some one here to appreciate it the way I did? Will their appreciation turn to fear? Is my fear more of a realization of lost childhood dreams or an actualization of my own adulthood?
Not that any of this makes me unhappy. I think its good for us to remember that our time is limited. It helps me to remember to cherish my time. To treat every moment like it is special, for it will never come again. Yes its hard some times to look up and gaze upon the stars with the same wantonness of my youth, my admiration for them as changed. I see them more of a constant reminder of how trivial our day to day actions really are. The fact that what we gain in our life, for the most part, is a trite effort at momentary happiness. It helps me keep perspective on the fact that true happiness must be found within. That me and me alone can turn my dreams and desires into reality. This humbling feeling of insignificance helps to motivate me to achieve the things that I feel are important. Keeping perspective on what is a transitory objective and a life achievement.
Now no matter what we do, no one will live forever. Do we want to be remembered as a world obsessed with iPods, flashy cars, gadgets, cell phones, bottles of wine, debauchery, waste, and callousness? Or do we want to be remembered for more? Is our jaded society that blinds itself with its own frivolous distractions really moving forward? Has all of our advances in medical science, understanding of the universe around us, or steps in technology made us happier as a species? It is not my worldly possessions or belongs that define me as an individual, but rather, my thoughts, dreams, loves and actions. I've gotten to a point where I don't even really think about the consequences of a choice but rather is this a decision I want to be remembered for. What we do and how we see ourselves today will become who we are tomorrow.
So now to ramble even more into a string of nonsense:
(From Black Soil Project - Evening)
I have seen all the things that are done under the sun.
All of them are meaningless; a chasing after the wind.
For who knows what is good for a man in life;
during the few and meaningless days he passes through like a shadow.
Who can tell him what will happen under the sun after he is gone.
There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven.
A time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build.
There is a time for everything.
So I commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad.
Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun.
Light is sweet and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.
However many years a man may live, let him enjoy them all.
But let him remember the days of darkness, for they will be many.
Everything to come is meaningless, be happy young man while you are young and let your heart give you joys in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and what ever your eyes see, but know that for all these things god will bring you to judgement. However many years a man may live let him enjoy them all.
As a child I loved the stars. Growing up where I did, in the middle of no where, there was nothing brighter at night than the heavens. I felt a strange attraction to them, they were always there, unmoving, unchanging. A constant in my life I could always count on. I knew that every day as the sun set they would be there. I would love to sit for hours and stare at this white speckled purple band stretching across the sky. I started reading as much as I could on them. I was 15 and reading books like Cosmos, A Brief History of Time, The Dragons of Eden. When I was young it was great to soak up this knowledge. It just fed more fuel onto the fire that powered my dreams.
As I've gotten older my love for the view of the stars that fill our night sky has only grown. But my passion for the understanding of them has not. Maybe it is my heightened sense of social awareness, maybe a better understanding of myself, or maybe it is just me coming to terms with my fears. Now when I analyze the sky with the knowledge I've accumulated my awe is turned into a new and strange feeling. I can't help but feel tiny, like a grain of sand being whisked away by a turbulent river. We are bombarded daily by the atrocities of the world we live in, which seems to be growing by the minute. I see the suffering and the joys of the world and then I look up. I am overwhelmed by this feeling of what does it all matter? We have people killing each other in the name of their god, we have people starving while others sit on piles of unused wealth and a million other injustices. Then I am reminded of my own mortality. Thoughts that echo to me that I won't be here forever. In a hundred years that star will still be shining down on this spot where I am. Will there be some one here to appreciate it the way I did? Will their appreciation turn to fear? Is my fear more of a realization of lost childhood dreams or an actualization of my own adulthood?
Not that any of this makes me unhappy. I think its good for us to remember that our time is limited. It helps me to remember to cherish my time. To treat every moment like it is special, for it will never come again. Yes its hard some times to look up and gaze upon the stars with the same wantonness of my youth, my admiration for them as changed. I see them more of a constant reminder of how trivial our day to day actions really are. The fact that what we gain in our life, for the most part, is a trite effort at momentary happiness. It helps me keep perspective on the fact that true happiness must be found within. That me and me alone can turn my dreams and desires into reality. This humbling feeling of insignificance helps to motivate me to achieve the things that I feel are important. Keeping perspective on what is a transitory objective and a life achievement.
Now no matter what we do, no one will live forever. Do we want to be remembered as a world obsessed with iPods, flashy cars, gadgets, cell phones, bottles of wine, debauchery, waste, and callousness? Or do we want to be remembered for more? Is our jaded society that blinds itself with its own frivolous distractions really moving forward? Has all of our advances in medical science, understanding of the universe around us, or steps in technology made us happier as a species? It is not my worldly possessions or belongs that define me as an individual, but rather, my thoughts, dreams, loves and actions. I've gotten to a point where I don't even really think about the consequences of a choice but rather is this a decision I want to be remembered for. What we do and how we see ourselves today will become who we are tomorrow.
So now to ramble even more into a string of nonsense:
(From Black Soil Project - Evening)
I have seen all the things that are done under the sun.
All of them are meaningless; a chasing after the wind.
For who knows what is good for a man in life;
during the few and meaningless days he passes through like a shadow.
Who can tell him what will happen under the sun after he is gone.
There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven.
A time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build.
There is a time for everything.
So I commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad.
Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun.
Light is sweet and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.
However many years a man may live, let him enjoy them all.
But let him remember the days of darkness, for they will be many.
Everything to come is meaningless, be happy young man while you are young and let your heart give you joys in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and what ever your eyes see, but know that for all these things god will bring you to judgement. However many years a man may live let him enjoy them all.
xo
miss hangin w/ ya bud LOL