Here we go again. No special company on this day - again - for the 44th time :-(.
Whoa is me :-(. I just seem to can't get it up there or even have the guts to talk with a woman nowadays - date or ANYTHING.
People are just so damn afraid of me because of recent protests and civil unrests probably. Some woman was walking so fast behind me that she even didn't want to slow down. This was in front of her kid too. I can only imagine what kind of impression she made to him about black people. She was hispanic btw - another person of color. Not to say white folk are all bad now either. But I wonder what was taught or instilled into them when they were a kid about black people. Apparently not the right stuff.
I have it pretty bad over here. I know I've seen tons more of couples from different races now more than ever. That's good. I just wish it was more apparent and acceptable for me when I was a teenager. Those teenager years were VERY short lived too. Typical back then since the place I was being stunted in was over varyingly racist/ignorant too.
ASSHOLES !!! They were lucky I didn't sue the whole damn school district for malpractice. I'd rather be living my life than just talking to a therapist. I only do that because I don't want to end up in prison, shot, or just be blown up to be another poster boy example of what NOT to be.
In all of this, short of good experiences in love of all things. So I have to treat this day like it was any other day. IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE JUST ANOTHER DAY! I don't want to live that lie, but apparently it's the only way that I can stay sane. That's fucked up irony for ya.
But for now again, I must endure it. I would like to enjoy it at least once before I die with a woman of my desires or in the future hopefully if I get to be past 80 with a woman that actually likes my company. It would be nice for a day/time :-).
So for those who are fortunate enough to be with a significant other today, count your lucky stars because it's a privilege NOT EVERYONE gets to take part in. And if you're in America today, you'll NEED the heat because it's FUCKING COLD OUT THERE!!!!