Tuesday Jun 01, 2004

0
Dear Diary: damn
[01 Jun 2004|02:34pm]
[ mood | lonely ]
[ music | tosca tango orchestra-ballade 3 ]

you know how bad it hurts
when no one wants you
not even your family

I just, Don't know anymore.
I'm so lost.
I've been trying to find something to make myself complete.
But it seems, that everywhere I look.
I get pushed away.

why?
am I THAT bad.
What's so wrong with me that no one can care?
or they're afraid of me being so nice that at any moment I'll snap
and hurt them.


I haven't felt this pathetic since randy.
I guess everyone knows everything more then I do.

I thought I finally was going to leave this place.
and Now.
I guess I'm not allowed.

I'm going to go offline for a while.



so.
bye.

frown
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
yuriel:
im going to hug you tight again *hugs*
i have been there im in and out of there
it fucking sucks. but it cant be the truth
ill be waiting for your return
and youd better return!
mad love
EL SUICIDO LOCO
cerpent:
Feeling bad about yourself and having no self esteem is projected as a reflection that people see.
They will see and feel that and then not want to associate as people want other people to reflect off so that they see themselves and then feel good.
If you destroy that reflective image with bad self feeling they will shy away .
Believe in yourself and see this only as a rough time, do not give in to self doubt. Do not try to grab happiness in any form. its like mist you cannot hold it, With the right frame of mind and the right feeling within it will come to you, be patient , look to yourself and believe you are a good person build slowly from within . Build self esteem - give kindness and without wanting a return , it will come back to you - just be patient .

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