zaftigg

A photoset tomorrow night... if all goes well... I'll be doing something very against my usual grain....

going to the gym makes me happy. sitting in the steam room is my reward. walking around in the buff is a growth, in my book.

I can sometimes see myself on the outside. I am hard and prickely. A man stared at me today on Public Transporation. He moved his body to watch me walk by. I think it was in wonder more than disgust or lust. I still glared back at him for breaking the rules of public transport that I have agreed to.

But then a little girl waved at me as she walked off the train. I really dug that. Made me smile for at least three stops.

I need to surround myself with those positive influences in my life that make me forget the petty bullshit. Those driven bastards who are looking for the same life I am.

I would like more than anything to tell the truth. But confrontation frightens me.

Hope all is well. I need to start meditating again. and find a jewelry repair place that will restring my raptor claw.

cl0ck

Alright, on another note... ummm, how did I just find out that there is a film on Bettie Page coming out April 14th? I'm more gripped for disappointment than anything else... I wonder how in depth they will get into her late life reclusion and the incidents of questionable sanity in her later years, such as attempting to kill a fellow senior roommate... And Gretchen Mol has yet to win me over...