yasha

There is so much i'm thankful for this year specifically the roof over my head, the car I drive, the food I eat, the fact i'm employed, the lessons I've learned and the amazing boyfriend the universe has presented me after all the pain.

I understand every year on this day why some religious groups encourage "grace" before dinner to remind people that there are many others that aren't as blessed as they are as they are in their heated, untilitied, internet accessable, furnished homes while they sit at a table with available, happily clothed and clean family and friends with a loaded table of warm, fresh food in front of them. Even after writing that sentence I feel I don't give thanks enough, and my thoughts and heart go out to those who are missing any of those things. My financial position is not amazing. Having to take a week off after my wisdom teeth wasn't fun, not only because of the dry socket that resulted in laying on my boyfriend crying for 3 days before going back to the (fully covered by my dads insurance) dentist, getting the hole filled and acupuncture for the first time, but because that was a full week in a biweekly pay period I wont get back. Also having to take another week off due to the passing of my aunt. My house, financial position, clothes, food, and car are things I am thankful for this year.

As most of you know I lost an aunt (dads sister) late last month, but did you know I lost an uncle earlier this year as well? My dad lost both a brother and a sister this year, and I really feel for him. My sister Facebooked me after she heard the news of my aunt and made me promise I'd live to be old (120). My sister and I may not be as close as sisters should, but she felt enough to want me to know she loves me and would rather see me alive for a long time. I have 2 beautiful nieces I am blessed with who are 1 and 3. They always give me hugs and kisses and I know my sister has done amazing for her circumstance. These lovely little ones belly danced with me when I was in Penticton for dance training in August. Family is something I am thankful for this year.

Last of all, but just as important, I'd like to highlight the amazing man in my life (formerly known as RequiemOfDemons) who has been through a lot of shit with me and in his life in the past year. He's never left my side in the time of need, he's supported me in anything I wanted to do, taken me to concerts, and simply held me, brushed my hair aside and told me it'll be okay. He helped me learn that I'm much better than the piece of shit, used whore I thought I was, I'm worth more, and people actually like me. He advertised my dance show, and brought his mom to it, even when we were rocky. He understands how I work, what makes me tick, when I need a hug, and has always done the little things to make my day. I am thankful for all the flowers, cards, shirts I've snotted on, second chances, 6th chances, support, and how much he believed in me. If you're reading this, Brett, I cherish everything you've done for me and i'm sorry I ever disappointed you. Although I'd rather not mention, but I will because he's done some good for me, is my ex. There was a lot of pain and hurt from what he did and what I did, but in the end I learned how low someone will put themselves when emotions are involved and the word "love" is used and sometimes abused. Without what he did I probably wouldn't know a lot that i know now. Brett and the lessons Cohen taught me are things I am thankful for this year.

Thanks for reading. <3's from yasha