yap

I HAD THE MOST AMAZING 4 DAY WEEKEND EVER.

But the amazingness was ambushed by sad yesterday evening.

I am single, after two years of being with Alex. He is amazing and is the best thing that ever happened to me, even with the issues we had. I still do think it was a matter of meeting at too young an age and we're both too immature and selfish with our own lives to have been in such a deep, committed, responsibility filled relationship. We're still friends, and have also said that if a lustful moment arrizes and it feels acceptable, then why not! Haha yea...It's tough to give up great sex, right?

This past weekend was ICon29. It was great. I put together a costume, which was Bane (from Batman). I feel like I did a damn good job. It's not totally done, but it's still sweet.



And here's my dedication to the cross dressing costume. It hurt to breath...my ribs could only expand so much!




This little dude dressed as the green ranger totally thought I was a dude. We had a man-handshake. I was pleased. And when I went back to the dealer room the next day, in my civilian gear, I was totally creeped on by the pewter figure seller. He kept asking everyone, as a joke, "Are you caressing my pewter?" He had the most righteous smoker's voice! I told him that I bought something last year, and he said that he remembered me. "A pretty face like yours is hard to forget" XXXXDDDD AAAAHHHH!! HAHAHAHA AWESOME!!!

I bought some cool stuff. I'll be posing with my nerdy shit later when I get bored near my camera. haha

Sunday night was the best night of the weekend. I went to my friend, Rick's bbq. Brought Cap't Morgan Long Island Iced Tea mix. Drank 90% of it myself, and also had a few Bud Lights. Had a MAJOR flirting session with his wife's friend, Mike. Mike had a semi-mohawk style, nose hoop, and several hoops in his left ear. Dark hair and light eyes....cute....but a smoker....GROOOSSSS. But I was drinking, so my judgement was a bit off. I didn't care enough about his smoking I guess. He gave me possibly the Best massage of my life. He told me I'd probably be sore and maybe even a little bruised from it. Yea...my shoulders are still very tender. They're usually really tight...I have the tightest shoulders in the world. But the massage def. did help...I'm just kinda sore now....I'm a sucker for a good massage....I was putty in his hands...the bastard. haha He even had me sitting on his lap, with me totally bent over (hands on floor) while rubbing my back. I was pretty drunk and he was pretty masterful. I'm still thinking about that fucking massage! I want more!! I couldn't help myself...I couldn't stop myself from walking him out when he left later on. Aaaaaand we kissed. Or rather, he tongue raped my mouth. And it tasted like a smoker's mouth. Not cool man....You hafta learn to kiss more with the lips, and stop that fucking smoking. Seriously. It's so much hotter to have proper lip action with some teasing tongue. But the man was excellent with those hands and he also could carry on a pretty good conversation. I'm a pretty sarcastic, kinda harsh individual, and I need someone who can deal with that, and not get offended. I can only hold back the beast for so long...sometimes it's got to get out for some fresh air, and I don't wanna make a guy cry! Haha But I really do try and hold the harsh back until I'm around ppl who can take it. But Mike conversed well. He made me feel a fool a few times, but in a teasing, flirty way. I didn't mind. It was refreshing to talk to a guy who can dish out some fun abuse. Haha
He also guessed my weight, and of course, got it wrong. Everyone was actually flabbergasted by my actual weight. Mike guessed 130/140 tops. Then he picked me up under my arms (with such ease! haha sorry...I love a strong guy XD) and said "Yea, buck-forty tops." NOPE! I'm a little over 170lbs. No one there believed me, and when he saw the scale sitting a mere few feet away, he told me to go stand on it. I did, and it read just what I said! Well..a little over cuz of the clothes.

**sigh** What a weekend....Would have been alot better if Mike hadn't kissed me, or was actually single!!!!! Yea...He's not available, and he kissed me. I wasn't single at the time either, but I knew Alex and I were over for a couple weeks before it actually happened. I don't condone what I did, I still "technically" cheated, but we broke up the next evening. And I wouldn't have gone any further than that kiss anyway. I would NEVER do anything of the sort.....I don't know that I would've told Alex or not about the kiss though, if we were still together....At least not now. He already doesn't know about a couple other ppl I've hooked up with, because we are still friends. He didn't need to be paranoid about the ppl I hangout with. No need to make him think I'm going to cheat n' screw them when I wouldn't. I know how to keep a friendship just that.

So, in summary...I had an amazing, fun, expensive (fuckin dealer's room) time at ICon29 this past weekend, and I received an hour long massage while drunk. It was amazing, and led to a kiss outside, but then I found out from Rick that the guy isn't single. And last Night Alex and I broke up. We're still friends n' whatnot, but it still sucks major.



Heartbreak is NOT awesome.






but flirting is!!