yanelie

today i really feel very bad... happens that the last friday i kiss a really nice boy... but.. he sacared me... because he wants to be more time with me than i wanna... so i get scared and get lost... but he works in my job... and yesterday i saw him and i really was very idiot with him... i tried to not talk with him and then he said "you don t wanna to go out, so well let me to leave you at home..." and the idiot of me get crazy.. because i wanna my space..because if i say no... it's no and stop... let me do what i want when i want.. don't try to put pression in me... i really know this isn't his intentions with me... i think he only wan to be nice with me... but i feel he was invading my space and me... and really didn't know how to react in that situation without be bad with him... so the end of the situations was... i have a surprising flee away from work... and now i think that "solution" was the worst ideaaaaaaa... i only seem like a stupid litlle girl who doesn't know how to endure with boys... and i really be that with him... so today i feel very bad.. because i feel like me was a very evil person with him.. and he is a very good boy... and he didn't deserve this...

i never want to be bad with people... and less with good people... oh really i feel very sad and evil.

arghhh... and the worst is i can't explain it to him to he sorry me... because i don't wanna hurt him... i dont wanna say him that i am not a romantic person and less with guys who i newly meet... and if the guys act in that way (romantic and sticky) with me, i feel a distance ( like 200000 miles away)... and they scared me... and usually i act in this way, in this idiot way, and hurting way.

welll i only need to explain this to somebody... doesn't matter who.