xxtinkerbellxx

I've been consumed by a number of things this past month which has led me to be a little lax in writing. BUT I actually had a thought that was worth writing down today...such a momentous occasion deserves a blog entry. I realized today that the vast majority of the conversations that I have with my friends centers around their dissatisfaction with men. I've got one girl trying to ask a guy out to dinner and wondering why he suddenly AWOL all the time. I've got a gorgeous cousin who is looking for a guy to use for money and wondering why all the men she talks to stop calling her. I've got a sister who is dating a boy who inexplicably turned cold and unfeeling. These are just the ones I could remember off the top of my head. After talking to all these women, I realize that I end up saying the same thing to each of them: some variant of 'you need to be the one to make yourself happy' and 'stop stressing out and just let it happen.' Without fail, my comments get brushed off and my friends proceed to continue more of the same and ending up even more miserable. Yes, my comments are trite but it is so unbelievably true: if you take responsibility for your feelings and happiness- TRUE responsibility- then, you'll be happy regardless of what the men in your life are doing to you and you'll be empowered enough to leave a bad situation with confidence that it is the best choice.

So, there I am, on my mental soapbox, when I realize that...I fucking do the same damn thing. Maybe not with men (I love men waaaay too much to ever be angry with them!), but with exercise, career choices, fiscal responsibility, etc. My friend's 'man troubles' were exactly the same as my own troubles with life. We are all trying to do the same thing over and over again and get different results. What the crap!?

I feel like a little bit of a jerk for thinking that I have things under control just because I don't have any man trouble when my own life trouble is just as bad. Sigh. One of these days, I'll get my ego under control.