You know...you never truly understand how increadibly alone you are till you actually spend time alone. I know that sounds fucked up. But if you think about it, its really not. You know, if your life is full of shit happening like work, school, a band, cooking, cleaning, bills that kinda shit you never realize you are alone. Mainly because it doesnt really matter you do them cause you have too.
Well tonight was the night i realized it. I got home from work and i really wanted to do something because it was sooo beauitful out today. So like normal I picked up the phone and called Hannah (my best real life friend). It was when my phone picked up that strange voice on the speaker reminding me that, that number is no longer in service that i realized that she had moved to Boston a few days ago. It never really hit me till today that shes really gone. So with a sad face i walked to my truck and drove to Tibbs Drive In all by myself. As i sat there in the back of my truck, pepsi in one hand popcorn in the other watching van helsing i busted into tears. I really am alone here now. everyone has finished college and move on to bigger things, leaving me here all alone. And i dont blame them, its just the harsh reality that im 23 sitting alone in a drive in movie theater balling my eyes out dripping tears into my already soggy buttered popcorn. I dont date, i dont have time fore alot of friends, i dont have any kids, i really dont have anything anymore that truely makes me happy. i mean...ive seriously never felt this alone in my entire life. Ive never really known what it was like to be truely alone. it kinda feels like if you were the brightest star ever in history...but you are the only star in the sky...so does it really matter if you are bright? is the effort you put into being that bright star worth it if you cant even share it with another?
~meishial~
"Nobody can ever take a friends place-nobody." ~Maya Angelou~
Well tonight was the night i realized it. I got home from work and i really wanted to do something because it was sooo beauitful out today. So like normal I picked up the phone and called Hannah (my best real life friend). It was when my phone picked up that strange voice on the speaker reminding me that, that number is no longer in service that i realized that she had moved to Boston a few days ago. It never really hit me till today that shes really gone. So with a sad face i walked to my truck and drove to Tibbs Drive In all by myself. As i sat there in the back of my truck, pepsi in one hand popcorn in the other watching van helsing i busted into tears. I really am alone here now. everyone has finished college and move on to bigger things, leaving me here all alone. And i dont blame them, its just the harsh reality that im 23 sitting alone in a drive in movie theater balling my eyes out dripping tears into my already soggy buttered popcorn. I dont date, i dont have time fore alot of friends, i dont have any kids, i really dont have anything anymore that truely makes me happy. i mean...ive seriously never felt this alone in my entire life. Ive never really known what it was like to be truely alone. it kinda feels like if you were the brightest star ever in history...but you are the only star in the sky...so does it really matter if you are bright? is the effort you put into being that bright star worth it if you cant even share it with another?
~meishial~
"Nobody can ever take a friends place-nobody." ~Maya Angelou~
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
instarsia:
yes i totally have seen you at PRN. alot actually! wow. thanks for saying hi
ash:
hehehe, hun not everyone is as cool as you are. the last one was easy because of all the complaints I had that the RIVERS one was way too hard. and yeah, it was ... but thats why it was so very very amusing and impressive to me that you got it. that was the point, so I could be blown away. and it worked. will it work agn? lets see ... this next one goes out to you. come by sometimes and figure it out.