"Yeah, I probably won't be working here for very long. Just enough to pay some things off."
"Well, I hope you don't leave too soon, you give me somebody to look at."
*slaps forehead* I SO do not want to go to work today - I think I just smiled and turned around and as I made it through that kitchen door, I wanted to fucking die. I feel like a douche.
That was a conversation between Tim and I - I being the second person, unfortunately.
And then it suddenly occured to me that Mike AND Tim work with me today at four.
This is going to be awkward. Very, very awkward. Especially if I freaked Tim out.
Something I really, really hope I didn't do - 'cause that would be really bad.
I'd feel like crap.
My nerves are shot to shit right now. I'm sitting here praying to God that maybe something GOOD will happen to me for once in my life. And when I say good, I mean my own definition of good.
None of that moral crap.
If none of these three (I think I'd rather say two) things work out for me for the better - then I'll have to swear up and down that I have a defect.
Mike doesn't really count.
But as for Tim, he does seeing as he was the one I laid some cheesy line on last night. Haha.
This other "thing" is a dealing with Nate that will probably crash on me faster than you can blink your eyes.
In fact, I don't even want to discuss it unless it pulls through. No, this has nothing to do with having a relationship with him again.
It's just.... as for now, it goes unsaid. The things we write down on paper at six in the morning going on no sleep....
Yeah - I can't see this happening. I'm not the lucky kind of girl where these things come easy.
But I still gave it a shot. Everyone can do whatever they do, whether it be to worship a cow, to help me on this one.
Lord knows I need it.
Did I mention Nathan and Tim look a whole lot alike? Terrible. I know.
That just adds to the attraction, though. Can't help it there.
*puts face in hands* Oh, two thirty is fast approaching. This means taking a shower and getting ready for work. Which obviously means going to work. I don't feel good. Nervousness is a bitch.
Okay, okay Chelsea - just make yourself look pretty and go in there and mind your own business. Look ahead.
Aaah. Not that simple? If I could snap my fingers and just know I looked nice, I'd feel better. But I have to remember that is all a matter of opinion.
So maybe my piercings, blond hair, chokers, curves and eyeliner aren't appealing to the next person. That next person being Tim - or even Mike dare I say it - and I'm shot down and uncomfortable as soon as I walk into that restaraunt door.
Back up, confidence. I need that. It's supposed to help, right?
Right.
But after all this bullshit, there's still this Nathan issue. Maybe I won't even hear anything about it. That way, I can assume it's bad, but I won't really have heard it, so it just ends up for the best.
Of course I'm hoping to pull through on this one still.
Enough rambling. Wish me fucking luck.
"Well, I hope you don't leave too soon, you give me somebody to look at."
*slaps forehead* I SO do not want to go to work today - I think I just smiled and turned around and as I made it through that kitchen door, I wanted to fucking die. I feel like a douche.
That was a conversation between Tim and I - I being the second person, unfortunately.
And then it suddenly occured to me that Mike AND Tim work with me today at four.
This is going to be awkward. Very, very awkward. Especially if I freaked Tim out.
Something I really, really hope I didn't do - 'cause that would be really bad.
I'd feel like crap.
My nerves are shot to shit right now. I'm sitting here praying to God that maybe something GOOD will happen to me for once in my life. And when I say good, I mean my own definition of good.
None of that moral crap.
If none of these three (I think I'd rather say two) things work out for me for the better - then I'll have to swear up and down that I have a defect.
Mike doesn't really count.
But as for Tim, he does seeing as he was the one I laid some cheesy line on last night. Haha.
This other "thing" is a dealing with Nate that will probably crash on me faster than you can blink your eyes.
In fact, I don't even want to discuss it unless it pulls through. No, this has nothing to do with having a relationship with him again.
It's just.... as for now, it goes unsaid. The things we write down on paper at six in the morning going on no sleep....
Yeah - I can't see this happening. I'm not the lucky kind of girl where these things come easy.
But I still gave it a shot. Everyone can do whatever they do, whether it be to worship a cow, to help me on this one.
Lord knows I need it.
Did I mention Nathan and Tim look a whole lot alike? Terrible. I know.
That just adds to the attraction, though. Can't help it there.
*puts face in hands* Oh, two thirty is fast approaching. This means taking a shower and getting ready for work. Which obviously means going to work. I don't feel good. Nervousness is a bitch.
Okay, okay Chelsea - just make yourself look pretty and go in there and mind your own business. Look ahead.
Aaah. Not that simple? If I could snap my fingers and just know I looked nice, I'd feel better. But I have to remember that is all a matter of opinion.
So maybe my piercings, blond hair, chokers, curves and eyeliner aren't appealing to the next person. That next person being Tim - or even Mike dare I say it - and I'm shot down and uncomfortable as soon as I walk into that restaraunt door.
Back up, confidence. I need that. It's supposed to help, right?
Right.
But after all this bullshit, there's still this Nathan issue. Maybe I won't even hear anything about it. That way, I can assume it's bad, but I won't really have heard it, so it just ends up for the best.
Of course I'm hoping to pull through on this one still.
Enough rambling. Wish me fucking luck.
Talk to you later...
Im sure it will work out, ill pray to my statue of Ganesh for you.
I thank you are so dame cool, dont give up