So, thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday yesterday.
It was nice. I sat around most of the day but it was relaxing. I got to look at my finished set before choosing which ones to upload to the photoshop girl for pre-aproval. I also got an afternoon nap, which I LOVE.
I'm so glad my kids are as young as they are. They'll all go down for a nap at the same time some days, and that means I can too!
I helped my friend Jess shoot a couple application pictures. i know the site doesn't have many PSW suicide girls yet, but she's HOT guys! Jess is an even 5-feet tall, very curvy, but her personality is so sexy! I am keeping my fingers crossed for her to get accepted, because then we could shoot a few sets together.
Looking at the set I took Saturday, I thought I'd be alot more self-conscious about how my tummy looked or something. But really, out of the 187 pictures we took, I LOVED nearly 100 of them, and that is MORE than enough for a full set. I'm sure now more than ever that I'll get accepted. if not this time, then the next one.
Just looking for someone who can shoot for me here near newmarket. I've talked to a couple people who might be able to travel, but they're not sure, and even more not sure WHEN. I want to start thinking about maybe shooting my next set in a few weeks, when the weather really heats up!
My mother-in-law is definately coming now. She'll be here the 29th, and she's staying until July 8th... longer than i'd like, but I can't complain. I really do need help. maybe my house will actually be all clean and I'll have the spare room sorted out by the time my husband gets home. Now, my sister in law, whom i DESPISE, is insisting she's coming for a visit as well, in September, and staying for a whole 2 months!
I don't know if i could be civil to this woman for 2 MINUTES, let alone live with her and her horrible demon-spawn son for that long. Even if she stayed in a hotel, it wouldn't take me more than an hour to bring up why I hate her, who I won't let her alone with my kids, why I don't want her son sleeping in my house, etc....
just a FEW reasons I HATE these people...
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Okay, here's the skinny on the sister-in-law... my husband and I were seperated, he was overseas, and I had to live with her and my husband's mom for a few months. In that time she cut my daughter's hair against my EXPRESSED orders not to, she instaled things onto my computer that completely fried the hard-drive and i had told her she was not to get on it at all, she all the while made me feel like i owed her the world, freaked out at every phone conversation I had with Crash (because most of them ended up with me pretending to be busy and stomping off al aggrivated at him)...
At the time, i had a 6-month-old baby. she got up with him inthe middle of the night, even if i was already rocking and feeding him. she took him out of my arms several times and insisted I go back to bed. She even moved his bed into her room, and for a few days i didn't care. I was tired I guess. When I moved him back into my room, she would come into the room in the middle of the night and take the sleeping baby out of his bed and leave with him. I caught her trying to take him one night and she jostled him so he'd wake up and cry, then when I got out of bed to take care of him, she said she heard him cry and told me I could just go back to sleep. She went as far as to pull him away from me several times. Keep in mind that back then I was a very co-dependant and passive person.
The months got hotter and i started sleeping with my window open and no clothes on. In the middle of the night, I woke up with her banging on my door and trying to unlock it, freaking out. She started accdusing me of having someone in the room with me and yelling for her mom. I threw on my robe and let her inspect the room, even though it woke up BOTH of my kids who shared the room with me at the time...
She asked me one day to put some blankets or laundry or something in her room for her. There right in plain view on her desk was a framed NAKED picture of my husband from when he was 18 or so... i freaked out and told him about that the first chance I got.
Luna (who was only 18-months old) was always getting weird cuts and bruises, and once while i let my mother-in-law watch her, I came back to see the whole side of her head black with bruises, starting in her ear. Mother in law said that she was playing outside alone and must've hit the concrete, yet there was absolutely no blood or abrasions, and my mother in law should have known better than to let a BABY play alone, ANYWHERE. But I have a sneaking suspicion that my sister-in-law or nephew was the one who hurt her, and that mother-in-law was grocery shopping while it happened... I know my mother in law and I have very different ideas, but i have never seen or even heard of her doing anything to hurt my kids. neglect, maybe. Purposeful abuse, no.
My oldest child sleepwalks, and she kept waking herself, me and her baby brother up, so I let her move into a playpen in my nephew's room to sleep for a while. I was left (against my will and without prior knowledge) to watch him on several occasions overnight. One such night, I heard Luna crying and thought that she must have woken herself up sleep-walking. I walked down the hall to get her, and as i did, her cries became blood-curdling shrieks and you could hear a hard thumping sound. As I turned on the light, my nephew darted from where my daughter was to his bed and pretended to be asleep, There my not even 2-year-old daughter was, screaming, NAKED, out of her playpen, with a red knot on her head from where he had been beating her against the wall! Can you see why I didn't like the idea of having him around aghain? So his mother calls me a liar to my face, tries to tell me he was "helping her change her diaper" at 3am... He's 8. he fucking knows better! She even tried to guilt-trip me about calling her to come home from her boyfriend's place the next morning, when she was supposed to have been home at 11pm, and never even asked if I'd watch him.....The next 24hours, while I was looking for a place to live, i had 2 friends staying in the Den, I had both kids locked in my room with me, and I spent all of my time out of the house when I could. My husband all the time thought i was just freaking out or mis-construing the situations... he figured out later that his family had just gone insane.
I have had alot of problems with pregnancies before then, and had been on bedrest with both of my older children. I found out during all of this that I was pregnant again. I have had several miscarriages in the past and was already dealing with alot of stress and alot physically just dealing with 2 kids alone. When I finally HAD to leave (hey, better a homeless family than children constantly abused and maybe worse...) I spent some time in California at a camp-ground. I had to go there to get my passports done anyways. While I was out, dealing with all of this bullshit (and alot more) I miscarried. Luckily for me, I had friends nearby who helped with he kids while I was in the hospital. My boyfriend at the time saved my life, and the kids lives.
When I got back to NV, my mom, dad and boyfriend helped me get all of my stuff out. My in-laws showed up as we were packing upo the van, and starteds a bunch of shit... They treated me like an ungrateful sneaky bitch who lied to them abused their trust ... etc... And then in the middle of my nervous break-down, I just got up and walked out. I was already suicidal, and every word they said made me closer and closer to never coming back. I stayed with my parents for a while off and on, and with my old friend Steph (who is aso on my list of people I'll never trust or talk to again)... I lived in my car for a while too... my husband and I were going to get a divorce, and i had to fly where he was to get it all done faster. So when he flies out to pick me and the kids up, his sister is on the same plane swomehow, and tels him i'm having an affair with my friend Jimmy (eeew, and no. not that it was any of her business, nor did she need to know what was really going on) and that I snuck off to California in the middle of the night to HAVE AN ABORTION!!!!!!!
I may be pro-choice, but for me it's NO choice! Even had I been raped or suffered incest, nothing could ever make me kill my innocent child! NOTHING! And she knew how my husband and i felt about that, and she saw how distroyed I was after the miscarriage... she had the audacity after all that she put me through to try and turn my husband against me...
We figured out later that she was trying to get him to leave me so he would spend his time with her and her bastard son... Remember, this is the lite version of the story, not the whole thing... and then you'll see why I want nothing to do with thisw bitch or her offspring (who also threatened my life and my kids' lives more than once...)... So, if she DOES come to England to visit, she better be visiting Morrison's grave, because if she comes within ten miles of me i might kill the bitch!
To this day i still haven't told her I know what she said to my husband, and i never let her have it for all of the things she said and did to my face. If she comes one foot onto my property i am going to let her have it, and I'm going to need 10 guys to keep me off of her or there will be blood.
I am irate still, nearly 2 years later, to the point that I might have another breakdown. If I see her again, or my mother-in-law tries to guilt me into a relationship with her, or anyone says anything to even suggest she's "not that bad" I'm going to end up screaming and crying until I throw up!
"Family" has always been very important to me. So it blows my mind to se family treat eachother like this... And what else s realy bothering me right now.... my mother, who has yet another cancer operation in 2 weeks, just got thrown out on the street by my grandparents. She and my dad and brother have been renting one of their houses and they were told yesterday they have 2 weeks to vacate the premises. So my mother has cancer, my brother has almost been institutionalized recently, and has been so physically ill that he is onn manditory home-bound study for his whole freshman year! My dad is stuck in a job that won't allow them to move out of town, but they need the job for the insurance because they're the only people who will cover my mom ever again. And now they're homeless and I feel utterly helpless. i want so much to help them out the way they've helped me so much, but being in another country right now, there isn't anything i can do! I'm looking into everythin I can think of, trying to find a way to help them. But the most I can realy hope for is to find some money and fly there o help them move or something.... and that would take an act of god herself... I am talking to the local legal office and everything. But it's going to e a few days at least before i can get any answers or ideas......
To top it off, my mom wired me $100 for my birthday. I can't let her do that! I know she wanted to do something for me, but how do you make your MOM understand that she needs it more than you do? *sigh*
Sorry for the rant... I'm off. I'll talk at you guys more later, once I'm less emotional. 
i cant wait to see the pics!!! im all tingly inside just thinking of them! i think this set is the most anticipated set i have ever been waiting for!!!! hugs my darling. im here if you need me