xtoxxicsuicidex

I am changing my life.
I am going to make my life better. I will have the things i want. I will have the money i need. I will have a beautiful life. I'm doing it now. I am determined to change how things are going. something going on in my life i don't like? i am going to change it. I will be confidant. and beautiful. and strong.

And i am going to start with the things i take forgranted. Because thinking about the things i don't have just makes me realize that i don't have them more. When i should be thinking about the things that i am already blessed with.

So, here it goes. What i take forgranted.

and let me tell you, i take manythings forgranted. here are just a few


* Mehdi. He's quite possiably the most amazing boyfriend i've had. I take him forgranted daily. He treats me wonderfully. and he makes me happy. which is extremly important. {mehdi, i know you will read this-{since you frequently do}-and i wanted to tell you thank you. Please don't just ignore this, or tell me i'm cute. because i mean this from the bottom of my heart. You are an amazing person, and i shouldn't take you forgranted. I'm sorry. thanks for being there for me, and putting up with all my attitude, and being upset. i AM changing it. }
* My family. My stepdad is my daddy. He's one of my best friends. My mom and i get along wonderfully and we can talk to each other about anything. we have alot in common. My sister is smart as a whip, and i'm glad. She takes after me, so hopefully my changing will inspire her too.
* My grandma. I love her more than she knows. She and my grandpa raised me, and i need her in my life so bad.
* My aunt. She is one of my hero's. she is so strong. ^_^ I think she knows the secret. :]
* My friends. They alwayts have my back, and i have them in abundance. They always make me laugh, and make me feel better. Without them, i would probably becompletely different.

* My exes. Im a fan of the saying "don't frown because its over, smile because it happened."
* My mind. the most important thing i have. My creativity, and my imagination.

Now, onto some material things.

* Electricity.
* Blankets
* clothing/socks/shoes
* personal hygeine products
* food
* water
* air conditionion {lol}
* flowers.
* The beach/ocean.
* Animals.
* My cell phone.
* milk.
* privacy.
* science.
* medicine
* technology.
* earth.
* grass. tree's. forrests.
* sidewalks, roads, doors
* cars/transportation
* literacy
* school/edducation
* books books books.
* pictures{memories!}
* the ability to see,hear,smell,touch, and taste things.
* the ability to love, and to be loved.
* candy. LOL.
* the 5 simple machines.

and many other things. I just wanted to write this blog, because seriously. this is it for me. I will become a whole new person. I mean, same personality, only happier, healthier, and wealthier.

I want to let everyone in my life know how important they are too me {especially you mehdi.} because NO one knows whats going on in my brain, not even my boyfriend..Its way to complicated to understand, he just thinks he has an idea of whats going on, but he doesn't.
NOTHING is wrong with me. I am a strong healthy individual. I am smart, and I am a woman.

i have nothing to complain about. Nothing to lose, but much to gain.

i will post more tomorrow.
I am going to make a vision board tomorrow i think. :]

-Chelsea