xstephx

my computer man friend tells me that it's more expensive to fix my laptop than to buy a new one.

my boyfriend tells me "you never know. you might be a great wrestler. you've never tried."

my aunty tells me that i'm her favourite.

i'm not too sure where i was going with this but i can't think of anything else.

i'm trying to find my spot. my special place in this world that was made just for me. i'm sure we all are. there is so much going on inside my head and inside my heart and i know that i have a lot to apply, i just don't know what to. or where. or how. or when. sound familiar?

i'm in debt. i got a mastercard the minute that I turned eighteen, you know for "emergency purchases" only. the first thing i did upon activating it was to purchase an sg membership. basically it's never been paid off in full since then. despite this, i allowed myself to think that if i got a personal loan I would use some of that loan to pay off my card, which i would then destroy. i got the personal loan. which i manage thanks, in part, to the fact that money is automatically taken out of my savings account and deposited into my loan account on a fortnightly basis and also the fact that once money is paid back into the account I can't redraw on it. I didn't pay my credit card off. so now i have two debts. Not to mention the money that I borrowed off my friend to get my chest piece. he was sick of hearing about how badly I wanted it. But now i have it and now there are a host of other things that I badly want as well:

- touch ups to my chest piece
-cheek piercings (although not entirely viable at present given my position as a legal secretary)
-anti labret piercing (again not entirely viable)
-some labia piercings
-a bow tattoed on my "pubic bone" i suppose would be the best way to describe it
-tickets to see soulfly
-a new lap top
-a couple ounces of weed haha

But priorities are priorites and right now not a single thing on that list fits into that category. I really need to clear my debt first. and fix my car. and pay my electricity bill. definately need to pay my electricity bill.

We're having some of the coldest weather we've had in years here in Oz. I don't like winter. I especially don't like the cold. We're not used to it. We're the "sunburnt" nation as they say. I've got no appropriate clothes for when I get to work at 9:00am and it's three degrees. So basically I'm wearing mismatched layers of stockings and tights and singlets and shirts and jackets and hoodies and I look like the abominable snow guy whatever his name is. I'm flying to Sydney on the east coast next friday to see a band and last night Sydney had the coldest night in 61 years

But anyway.

I'm happy. Very happy. I have a special someone who is very special indeed. The fuck friend that I was talking about a while back - should i tell him, or shouldn't i? Well i did. Thanks for your advise but I told him I had feelings and it paid off very well. We've now been "seeing" eachother for about ten months and going out for four of those and he is the most beautiful metal drummer stonner kid i've ever had the pleasure of touching myself in front of.

I live out of home. I can afford to pay my rent. My room mate works nights while I work days so we don't get sick of the sight of each other. We hardly ever even lay eyes on each other. My car still works. I have recently become good friends with teagan (aka Vodka_Socks) and Charles (aka computer man friend) and as of the 21st June, the days are once again getting longer.

I'm just hanging out for summer.