Tonight I'm really lonely... I got off work at one and I let my sister borrow my car... she must have fallen esleep because come quitin' time my ride hadn't arrived.
It was a hectic night as is without the added stress of having to worry about a ride, which of course led to my worrying over my car, shitty as it may be...
I ended up walking home, quite a walk, from the edge of the city where I work into south Hayward. Sometimes I forget I'm a girl living right below Oakland before I take into consideration these long night strolls...
It was a beautiful night tonight, the sky was that washed out black just before the stars fade and the sun washes out the darkness. I was enjoying the subtleties of the dieing Saturday night when I was accosted by the usual drunken slags that wander the streets at night... sloppy questions, inuendo, can't remember exactly what words were exchanged before I began to realize I wasn't gonna slip out of this sticky situation as easily as I had escaped my gender in the past. He grabbed his crotch and made sleezy references as I warn him I wasn't in the mood to play games. He grabbed my arm and panic set it, I felt all of a sudden really small and trapped but I still think I was more pissed off than scared... I manage to plaay dumb and dodge him keeping a fast and steady pace away from him, He shouter at me to come back but thank god he was too wasted to use his feet...
the whole sitution just made me think... what if? hmm... when I got home my sis had just fallen esleep and everyone was already in bed, house locked up for the night... I tip toed through the house and when my door was closed tightly behind me I was overwhelmingly sad... no one would have noticed I were home late, no one would have noticed I was waiting for a ride, I could have been drug behind some building while this house sat quiet amd still... I need to be more careful... wish David were around to talk to, he makes me feel safe and happy... like there's something to look forward to...
It was a hectic night as is without the added stress of having to worry about a ride, which of course led to my worrying over my car, shitty as it may be...
I ended up walking home, quite a walk, from the edge of the city where I work into south Hayward. Sometimes I forget I'm a girl living right below Oakland before I take into consideration these long night strolls...
It was a beautiful night tonight, the sky was that washed out black just before the stars fade and the sun washes out the darkness. I was enjoying the subtleties of the dieing Saturday night when I was accosted by the usual drunken slags that wander the streets at night... sloppy questions, inuendo, can't remember exactly what words were exchanged before I began to realize I wasn't gonna slip out of this sticky situation as easily as I had escaped my gender in the past. He grabbed his crotch and made sleezy references as I warn him I wasn't in the mood to play games. He grabbed my arm and panic set it, I felt all of a sudden really small and trapped but I still think I was more pissed off than scared... I manage to plaay dumb and dodge him keeping a fast and steady pace away from him, He shouter at me to come back but thank god he was too wasted to use his feet...
the whole sitution just made me think... what if? hmm... when I got home my sis had just fallen esleep and everyone was already in bed, house locked up for the night... I tip toed through the house and when my door was closed tightly behind me I was overwhelmingly sad... no one would have noticed I were home late, no one would have noticed I was waiting for a ride, I could have been drug behind some building while this house sat quiet amd still... I need to be more careful... wish David were around to talk to, he makes me feel safe and happy... like there's something to look forward to...