1. A day without sunshine is like, night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. I just got lost in thought. It wasn't familiar territory.
4. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
5. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
7. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
14. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
15. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
16. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
17. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand...
18. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
19. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something...
20. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
21. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
22. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
23. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
24. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
25. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
26. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
27. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
28. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak....
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. I just got lost in thought. It wasn't familiar territory.
4. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
5. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
7. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
14. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
15. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
16. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
17. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand...
18. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
19. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something...
20. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
21. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
22. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
23. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
24. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
25. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
26. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
27. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
28. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak....