So, through the magic that is the internet, last night I ended up browsing through pictures of the ocean. Now, I'm absolutely terrified of the water. Maybe I could manage being in a boat, but there's no way in hell you'll get me into that water. Why then, am I so fascinated by the ocean and the things it contains? Why does it draw me in so effortlessly? See, the thing is, I'm not particularly afraid of sharks, or anything else in the water, any more than I'm afraid of bears, or lions, etc. That isn't fear, that's a healthy respect for these amazing creatures who could easily tear me to pieces.
But there's just something about the water...
There's something about that darkness, about the abyss.
We're out of our element in the water. We can't move as freely, we can't exert as much force, react as quickly. You get the point. But it's not just that. There is something about the void, the black, the deep. It's not emptiness. If that were the case, I'd be afraid of space. But I'd go into space in a heartbeat if I had the chance.
But is it that simple? Is it just because there are other living organisms in the ocean that terrifies me? Then I should be just as afraid on land, right? But I'm not.
Is it the unknown? The fact that you can look down into the darkness of the deep, and not know what's just out of sight?
Any of you who read this who are gamers probably know all about Subnautica. For those who don't know, it's a survival game that takes place on an alien world. You crash land in an ocean, and have to brave the depths to survive. Despite all of what I've already said, I somehow managed to play that game to completion. The creatures were scary, that's true enough. But the real moments of fear came from leaving the shallows behind, reaching that first stretch of open ocean, and looking down into the blackness below. That was where my stomach dropped, and I felt like I wouldn't be able to finish playing.
I think that's a big part of it. The vulnerability. There's nowhere to take cover if something attacks. And it doesn't have to something big either. It doesn't need to be a giant shark, or a kraken, that drags you too the depths. All it takes to bring down a swimmer, is just a few pounds of force. Jeremy Wade, the fisherman on River Monsters, did an experiment that showed that 20-25 pounds of extra weight was enough to make him submerge. A quick search shows that you can find at least 550 pound test line for sale to the public. That means there is plenty of stuff in the water capable of exerting enough force to bring a person down.
In the end, I think it's a mixture of these elements. The unknown, the helplessness, the creatures swimming with you... it all adds to the fear. My, perfectly rational, irrational fear.
But why, again, does it interest me as much as it does?
