this is not a rhetorical question

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Why would you have a child, and GIVE THAT CHILD YOUR NAME, if you're going to spend his entire life bullying him, humiliating him, and treating him like shit? This is not a rhetorical question. I genuinely want to know and understand.

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arroezze:
My father and I have the same name almost exactly. With the exception of a different middle name, but the same letter. However, he used it as a form of social security fraud. Needless to say I started my life with maxed out credit cards and a horrendous credit score before the age of two.
selahh:
deep self hatred? idiocy? jealous that the kid is the better version?

Friday

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For as long as I can remember, I have had insmonia to some extent. It is very hard for me to fall asleep, and I struggle to stay asleep. It's not uncommon for me to wake up four or five times a night.
Because that doesn't make existing in the world difficult enough, my natural Circadian rhythm wants to stay awake until 2 or 3...
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silky:
Insomnia is the worst ! I wake up multiple times as well! Sometimes it’s good to drink some chamomile tea before going to sleep!
littlejohn22:
I have started to use some CDB to sleep as well, it works so well i fall asleep so quickly that i have to watch how early i take it

caught in the crossfire of childhood and stardom

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I occasionally get these memories that are so vivid, it feels like time collapsed for a second, pushing the past into the present, before it retreats back into the sea of time.

This happened last night, while I was watching The Toys That Made Us, about LEGO, of all things.

I was always a good student when I was a kid. I worked hard to...
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sunshine:
thanks for addressing my guilt for enjoying your childhood work.  You hit the nail on the head ;)
sunshine:
I'll check out that Lego doc. Thanks for sharing this.  Ahhh the complexities of remembering how you became who you are today.  I didn't realize you were journaling so much on here.  You inspire me to be better at blogging  (which wouldn't be very difficult considering its been almost a year since I posted :D)

the golden apples of the Hesperides

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One of my biggest regrets in my life is that I didn't go to college. When I was 18 and desperate to get out of my parents' house, I moved to Westwood, where UCLA is, and moved in with Hardwick, who I'd known for a little bit, and who was already attending.
I planned to enroll in two years of Extension, and then apply to...
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noend:
Thanks for sharing this story. And yay you!
bearface:
Good on you for getting out there and getting your learn on! I don’t know how he is as a teacher, but as a writer Sanderson is one of my favorite contemporaries out there working. Glad you seem to have gotten some useful tidbits from the class and I think that the validation of your current process and abilities can be just as important. I hope you stick with it, learning is one of those things best spent a lifetime pursuing.

cleanup on aisle me

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Earlier this year, I made some significant and substantial changes to my life, continuing the process of growth and reflection that I started when I quit drinking almost four years ago. (Sidebar: it's remarkable how much clarity I got, and shocking how much pain I was self medicating for so much of my life. I'm so grateful for the love and support of my friends,...
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littlejohn22:
A purge is needed now and again with many things eh. We are doing that as well as i build my shed... i do not want to move STUFF if i do n to use it
sandalgod:
Wow that resonated with me a lot. Thanks for sharing!

This is sickening, and depressing.

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Unsurprised, but deeply disappointed, that not a single Republican voted for the formal impeachment inquiry in the House, especially after the stunt they pulled earlier this week. Absolutely sickened that two Democrats voted with them. Trump's going to get away with this, and America will solidly become the corrupt, right wing, authoritarian cult of personality Trump's been dreaming of since time began. He's already an...
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littlejohn22:
This is sickening for your country and i am concerned for where it is going
pointman11:
Heartbreakingly well said. It's a sad time to be a us citizen

Throwback Thursday

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When I was at a con a couple weeks ago, I met a lovely woman who shared her scrapbook from the 80s with me. It’s kind of a time capsule of me from about 13 to 17, filled with pictures and clippings from all the teen magazines my mother made me be part of, even though it was *way* out of my comfort zone to
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catdad:
Can you seriously criticize the style any of us had in the 80s?  Was any of it good?  Not really, but it's what was 'in' in some way or another at the time.
gman0033:
I've never been in anything near the same situation,  but what you said about the fear of humiliation and the inability to join in the group really struck a chord. I've  lived my whole life feeling that way in almost all group situations. It's funny how you know something but it doesn't really crystallize until someone else says it. Thanks for sharing!

So I'm Watching Deep Space Nine for the First Time.

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When Deep Space Nine was new, I was still working on Next Generation. I recall feeling this strong sense of sibling rivalry (entirely my issue, never created or encouraged by anyone else) that got in between me and my ability to watch the show, and give it the chance it deserved. Also, by 1993, I was 21 and feeling like it was time for me...
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kungfury:
Yeah I still yet to watch DS9 myself. I watch TNG with you in it and it’s still my favourite & I'm not just saying that since your in it lol. But I grew up watching TNG and it still holds up. My brother in law is a big fan of DS9 and he’s always saying to me to get my head out of my ass & watch it haha. I think I’ll get that guide you mentioned since it sounds like the perfect guide to start watching DS9 for newcomers like myself. Also hear Voyager is good too but again I’m not sure. I do agree about binge watching through tv shows, I don’t like that either. I prefer taking my time too to adjust to what happened. It’s tricky with some shows these days. Like with The Flash for example. I watched the first season and there were a lot of crossover episodes with Arrow & most of the time it’s confusing since I haven’t seen Arrow much. I kinda find that annoying that I have to keep switching through one show to the next to make sense out of the story. Kinda a pain in the ass imo. Luckily I hear it’s not required with DS9. It is it’s own show and that’s awesome! 😊
drocculari:
Thanks for the reference to Max Temkin's DS9 guide. I haven's seen the show since it was originally broadcast. Since watching the What We Left Behind documentary I keep putting off revisiting it because of how much is there.

happy 18th birthday to wwdn

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18 years ago today, I pressed publish on wilwheaton.net. It wasn't the fanciest website in the world, but I went from knowing nothing about HTML and scripting to launch in just six weeks, and I built it entirely by myself (with some guidance from a couple of guys I've since lost touch with). I enjoyed writing in my blog (powered by Greymatter!), and I felt...
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littlejohn22:
great blog and my wife understands stepping into a step parent role... shine on you crazy diamond
nanette:
Happy anniversary! I love writing blogs for myself as well. It’s the best thing is to read about the thoughts I had in the past and see where my growth has taken me, or even helps me realized if I derailed form where I really want to go. Sometimes the best parents aren’t by blood, so stepping up to the plate is the most amazing thing to do.

about that audition...

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About three weeks ago, I had my first audition in … um … in so long, I can’t even tell you when the last one was, or what it was even for. I average about 4 auditions a year these days, because most of what acting work I do get is offered to me, and I’m not going to complain about that even a little...
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littlejohn22:
this is such a hard industry to stay involved in at times eh... chin-up and power through. Use those wins to Trump the losers... (too soon?)
pointman11:
its always great finding your blogs and perspectives on things all across the spectrum.  I admire your thoughts and how you have evolved as a person and actor
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