Tonight I said to myself... 'self... it's about time you update your damn journal.' Why don't these come with automatic spell checkers installed? I spent the weekend with my mom, who had come into town to visit from California. Hanging out with parents who don't understand you is aways a painful and uncomfortable experience. I'm torn between the need to be really close to her, but the fear that becoming close would ultimately result in disappointment on her side. It was like 95 degrees out all weekend and I tortured myself under the unmerciful sun by wearing longsleeves to mask my tattoos that she has never seen. Stupid. If I have any courage at all, I could have just come forth and told her. But, alas, my fear of her reaction prevented me from doing so. I feel as if I have been in a cage all weekend. Why can't I just be more open with her?! Not just with my tattoos, but with everything. Yes, I am not a normal person! I can't help it. I am just me. I really just wish she could see that her ideals aren't everything and that there are other ways to live. Right?! Okay then. So frustrating.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
shelliepooh:
hey babe u know its better to be rejected for being who you are rather than being praised for something u arent. u are more normal than u think. its the parents who are strange. its like who told them that at a certain age they have to abandon everything they found fun in their life. i mean they were teens once sneaking 10 people in the trunk of a duster to a drive in movie, tresspassing in an abandoned house to drink alcohol but god forbid one of their children get a tattoo. then the world is over. let ur mom see u for u.they were young once. how they forget this is beyond me. im gauranteed she wont be dissapointed and if she is then u dont need her in ur life anyway. u have obviously been fine without her. my mom is more accepting but u know what there is no element of closeness between us. we live together but i couldnt tell u the last time we even spoke to eahother, i wish it was different but i not going to harp on it. i dont know ive dragged this on way to much and id just like to add that ur a hottie and u can call me mom whenever u'd like. lol ok thats takign it a little too far isnt it??!!!
ltrain:
update yo shiz!