whiskeyagogo

Oh god. Things were going so well - and then....



I drove my freakin' car in a ditch! Ok - let's back up the story a bit.......
Last week I was getting my shit together - I did my taxes - getting money back - yay! And I've been working out and not drinking and blah blah....Then Thursday night rolls around and all hell breaks loose because all the Catholics around here take Good Friday off work. Which is really just an excuse to party Thursday night! So, I ran errands all day - I wore my "surrealist" Chucks with the extra eyes - love 'em!



- and was feelin' spring-y so busted out the white jacket AND the mirrored aviators - having a total Elvis moment -



I needed retail therapy after many mindless errands - but I have no money. So I went to - you guessed it! - Hot Topic! Yay - cheap clothes!



I love ruffle-butt panties! How about you?



And then, that night, I went out with my girl Robin. Driving to the restaurant, I saw a pretty sunset and noticed that the moon was almost full - uh oh!!





Look how the moon looks to be the same size as the red light - ha ha! Perspective is funny!

I saw this donut ad on a billboard and it made me hungry -



At this point I was wearing my stripey heels - I love these shoes too. Actually, I love shoes. Period.



Cut ahead several hours and several adult beverages later and I am, for some un-remembered reason, making this face at myself in the ladies room of a club -



That is the last pic I took....until the shot of my tow receipt and traffic ticket, as seen above. Apparently, when almost at my house, I misjudged a little turn and drove my passenger side wheels into a wet, muddy ditch. Unable to extract myself, I followed Rule #1 when in trouble - RUN!!!

I bailed to my house and the nice policeman showed up about 20 minutes later as they had discovered my abandoned vehicle. I then followed Rule #2 - LIE! I said I had ditched it hours earlier and had been at home drinking - ha ha - no one saw me and you can't prove it! After returning to the scene and being handed off to another officer, I ended up with a ticket for careless operation of a vehicle. While sitting in the back of his car, waiting for my tow to arrive, I heard another cop come across the radio, referring to me "Oh yeah, that's Chef Jon's ex-wife." Awesome. Rule #3 - when all the local yokel cops know who you are, it is TIME TO GO!

Soooo, long story long, I am fine, the car is fine, and I have a $161.50 fine to pay. Ha ha. Fine.
And I am moving to Atlanta next week on April 1 - SEE YA, YOUNGSVILlE PIGS! Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahaha....then end.