We do two things in this town, drink and play football. How unfortunate for me that as I get older I find the drink less appealing by the day. That I haven't watched an entire football game in my life. That I haven't played football since I was 12. Gym class, what a drag.
Today, as I was driving to the store to procure some Soylent Green, I noticed the town was alive. People on the streets, cars everywhere. Alas, it's here again. The local rivalry between the two best local football teams. How nice that such an event would coincide with the greatest of holidays.
Now I'm stuck inside for the next two days, too afraid to go outside. Am I afraid of the overly devoted football fans? The young hooligans dressed up as ghouls and sluts? No, I'm afraid of the hordes of police which will undoubtedly be released upon this drunken town.
Trick or treat, bitches.
Today, as I was driving to the store to procure some Soylent Green, I noticed the town was alive. People on the streets, cars everywhere. Alas, it's here again. The local rivalry between the two best local football teams. How nice that such an event would coincide with the greatest of holidays.
Now I'm stuck inside for the next two days, too afraid to go outside. Am I afraid of the overly devoted football fans? The young hooligans dressed up as ghouls and sluts? No, I'm afraid of the hordes of police which will undoubtedly be released upon this drunken town.
Trick or treat, bitches.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
issue_:
that sounds like a town a grew up in for a few years.
skoosh:
Yeah, bitches.