So....
Thursday was fun, Bre came and got me and we headed up to Fry's Marketplace so I could pick up my check so I could deposited and finally get out of the negative end of the spectrum. I am going to really try to keep my money in there and start saving so I can for one get a car and then maybe go back to school for writing and a minor possible in photography. I need to tap back into my artistic side. So we head up to Hot Topic so I can try and find these heels I saw online which they didnt have but they had these others in the clerance for like 11 dollars which I am like omg I cant pass this up. The whole time Bre is filming me so she can embrass me later on Youtube. We decided to try and see if the other Hot Topic to see if they had the ones I did want, to no luck, so we head to the meeting and I am like well there is a mall up here next to the meeting, cause I tried on the ones I got on sale and they didnt fit so I was bummed that I had no heels to wear to group (cause my first group I had my Day Of The Dead ones) So we checked that mall and they had a Hot Topic, but they didnt have the shoes I wanted to exchange so I ended up just getiing some crazy turquios ones (which I have decided that IronFist is the coolest brand)
Group goes okay I get commented on my shoes once again cause not a lot of rockstar like tgirls tend to exsist, which is cool cause I like knowing I have my own unique style.
So last night Bre tells me that after we go to this other support group, she was going to take me to this club called "Crusin 7th" which is trans friendly and has like drag shows and stuff. So I made sure I would get a little bit more dolled up. So I rocked the red heels, skinny black jeans, white studded belt, a black track jacket with some red accents, red headband white hearts, and add touch of class with some pearls. It turned out really cute and I wish I had more pictures of it. So at the club I was sitting and enjoying a gin and tonic (I wanted to see how it tasted when professionally made) and after a while this guy comes up who I could stand a word of what he was saying and offers to buy me a drink so I accept (I mean hey i like drinks) but like from then on I couldnt shake him. So I went to the bathroom and by the time I got back he was gone and so I am like yay I dodged the bullet. So then this other guy comes up and offers to buy me a drink and then is like lets talk in the corner (like I mention I like drinks) so were talking and he is getting kind of agressive and I am starting to freaked out and luckily my friend Bre comes over and sort of interrupts the chat and then we move to the other side of the bar
Now its four of us, Bre and this trans guy Joe (who she had been attached to the tounge of for most of the night), the creepy hawaian guy and me, So we are all kind of talking and creepy guy is like lets go out to my car and I am like well I need to get myself another drink, so I buy that one and like eff the straw and down it, then I am like oh I need another (martini) and oh what the hell another (a shot of tequilla) So basically when we left to take me home finally that next time we come here (loved the drag queens, why didnt they had hit on me) that we need to have a signal so she can come intervine if I felt uncomfortable, despite my confusion right now I know I could do a little bit better than what seemed to be comming my way.
I also introduced myself as Kayla for the first time and that was really weird.
I also am starting to see that I have a real thing for African American girls. Its also very interesting because Marc has a book he bought that talks about star signs and what that praticular star sign says about what you like and dont like relating to sexuality and listed under turn ons for Aquarius is African Americans.
Learnt a lot about myself this week.
Thursday was fun, Bre came and got me and we headed up to Fry's Marketplace so I could pick up my check so I could deposited and finally get out of the negative end of the spectrum. I am going to really try to keep my money in there and start saving so I can for one get a car and then maybe go back to school for writing and a minor possible in photography. I need to tap back into my artistic side. So we head up to Hot Topic so I can try and find these heels I saw online which they didnt have but they had these others in the clerance for like 11 dollars which I am like omg I cant pass this up. The whole time Bre is filming me so she can embrass me later on Youtube. We decided to try and see if the other Hot Topic to see if they had the ones I did want, to no luck, so we head to the meeting and I am like well there is a mall up here next to the meeting, cause I tried on the ones I got on sale and they didnt fit so I was bummed that I had no heels to wear to group (cause my first group I had my Day Of The Dead ones) So we checked that mall and they had a Hot Topic, but they didnt have the shoes I wanted to exchange so I ended up just getiing some crazy turquios ones (which I have decided that IronFist is the coolest brand)
Group goes okay I get commented on my shoes once again cause not a lot of rockstar like tgirls tend to exsist, which is cool cause I like knowing I have my own unique style.
So last night Bre tells me that after we go to this other support group, she was going to take me to this club called "Crusin 7th" which is trans friendly and has like drag shows and stuff. So I made sure I would get a little bit more dolled up. So I rocked the red heels, skinny black jeans, white studded belt, a black track jacket with some red accents, red headband white hearts, and add touch of class with some pearls. It turned out really cute and I wish I had more pictures of it. So at the club I was sitting and enjoying a gin and tonic (I wanted to see how it tasted when professionally made) and after a while this guy comes up who I could stand a word of what he was saying and offers to buy me a drink so I accept (I mean hey i like drinks) but like from then on I couldnt shake him. So I went to the bathroom and by the time I got back he was gone and so I am like yay I dodged the bullet. So then this other guy comes up and offers to buy me a drink and then is like lets talk in the corner (like I mention I like drinks) so were talking and he is getting kind of agressive and I am starting to freaked out and luckily my friend Bre comes over and sort of interrupts the chat and then we move to the other side of the bar
Now its four of us, Bre and this trans guy Joe (who she had been attached to the tounge of for most of the night), the creepy hawaian guy and me, So we are all kind of talking and creepy guy is like lets go out to my car and I am like well I need to get myself another drink, so I buy that one and like eff the straw and down it, then I am like oh I need another (martini) and oh what the hell another (a shot of tequilla) So basically when we left to take me home finally that next time we come here (loved the drag queens, why didnt they had hit on me) that we need to have a signal so she can come intervine if I felt uncomfortable, despite my confusion right now I know I could do a little bit better than what seemed to be comming my way.
I also introduced myself as Kayla for the first time and that was really weird.
I also am starting to see that I have a real thing for African American girls. Its also very interesting because Marc has a book he bought that talks about star signs and what that praticular star sign says about what you like and dont like relating to sexuality and listed under turn ons for Aquarius is African Americans.
Learnt a lot about myself this week.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
*hugs*
You're right about most trans girls looking like they've over done it... but there are some out there who carry themselves well. AND there are girls out there who are accepting. Yes, finding anyone who can truly accept you (you meaning anyone) for who you are is hard. I haven't quite found that myself. Such is life and relationships. But don't give up hope, because you KNOW someone IS out there. It's just a matter of patience before you find each other. You're never stuck unless you give up hope. And I can tell you that the look/being you are going for IS attractive.
Take it day by day. You'll destroy yourself with worry if you try to tackle it all at once. Figure out the bits and pieces, and the whole picture will come together much easier.
Much easier said than done, I know. And I know I can't help you too much, but I am here as a friend to accept you and care anyways. You can rant to me all you want kiddo, I'm just glad you feel you can