so i'm supposed to stay home and paint all day.
but my cousin said to come to the museum and to eat with grandma.
i rush to get myself ready and go to the museum which is good. i got a new poster to put up i just need a frame now. we went to the art store and to the wiz i got new headphones since my dog ate mine.
and everything is going fine.
then there is dinner ... and the parents get invited to dinner.
everything is fine at first and at somepoint in the conversation my tattoos get brought up ... cause this happens everytime the family gets together and then everyone just starts to critizes every aspect of everything i do. and it makes me crazy. how long am i supposed to sit there and be attacked by these people who claim that they love me. i'd say i last about a half hour till my mother made me cry and left and went and sat in my car while my father tried to follow me and i locked him out of the car. then like 10 minutes later out comes my drunk grandmother tapping on the fucking window and apologizing ... at least someone has the decency to do that ... my parents never do and we get into fights about stuff like this about 2 times a day. which is why i hide in my room most of the time ...
you would wonder why i'm so insecure, which i'd bet most people don't know i am. unless your someone i actually talk to, you would have no idea. i have trouble being close to people cause the people i'm supposed to be close with constantly are attacking me and my choices and my life. it's why i push people away. it's why i'm an asshole to people. it's why i try to not get involved. it's why i'm scared. and maybe it's normal.. but i don't cope with it very well at all. it makes me crazy. all i really need is people to be there... and its just very hard for me to let that happen.
*add*
my mom also closed the front door of the house basically in my face when we got home.
that was nice.
girl needs fucking love.
but my cousin said to come to the museum and to eat with grandma.
i rush to get myself ready and go to the museum which is good. i got a new poster to put up i just need a frame now. we went to the art store and to the wiz i got new headphones since my dog ate mine.
and everything is going fine.
then there is dinner ... and the parents get invited to dinner.
everything is fine at first and at somepoint in the conversation my tattoos get brought up ... cause this happens everytime the family gets together and then everyone just starts to critizes every aspect of everything i do. and it makes me crazy. how long am i supposed to sit there and be attacked by these people who claim that they love me. i'd say i last about a half hour till my mother made me cry and left and went and sat in my car while my father tried to follow me and i locked him out of the car. then like 10 minutes later out comes my drunk grandmother tapping on the fucking window and apologizing ... at least someone has the decency to do that ... my parents never do and we get into fights about stuff like this about 2 times a day. which is why i hide in my room most of the time ...
you would wonder why i'm so insecure, which i'd bet most people don't know i am. unless your someone i actually talk to, you would have no idea. i have trouble being close to people cause the people i'm supposed to be close with constantly are attacking me and my choices and my life. it's why i push people away. it's why i'm an asshole to people. it's why i try to not get involved. it's why i'm scared. and maybe it's normal.. but i don't cope with it very well at all. it makes me crazy. all i really need is people to be there... and its just very hard for me to let that happen.
*add*
my mom also closed the front door of the house basically in my face when we got home.
that was nice.
girl needs fucking love.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
I saw dillinger last fall, it was so fucking awesome. They blew me away. Their new singer pulls off pattons vocals very well. The best thing was then the singer blew fire for the last 3 minutes of the show. The management threw a fucking fit. It was fucking awesome.