Everyone is posting jokes so i figured i would post my favorite. it is off colour and contains poor language, so if that offends you, keep reading.
Two weasels are sitting in a bar. the first weasel turns to the second and declares, in a loud clear voice "so, i slept with your mother last night"
the entire bar hears this and goes silent to hear the second weasels response. you could have heard a pin drop in the bar. but the second weasel, he doesn't say anything, he just has a drink and stares straight ahead.
So the first weasel nudges him and shouts, "didn't you hear me? I fucked your other last night! i bent her over and gave it to her like the whore she is!"
The second weasel turns to the first and says,"go home dad, you're drunk."