walkingman

I have always walked to a different drummer. I have always gravitated to the weird, the oddball, the urbane, the introverted, the extroverted, the inverted, the overted, the strange and the socially unacceptable. I have taken the road less travelled, the hard way, and the road with many twists and turns instead of easy street and the easy way. I like a challenge and going against the grain and the majority. I has always questioned authority and asked the hard questions. In school I believed in reading the footnotes and challenging the teachers when things either did not add up or make sense. I learned early on that teachers did not know everything and that they lived in fear of students who discovered that the emperor wore no clothes. But I did learn humility early on which was a great life lesson. It was one thing to be smart but while it was an asset it was also a curse. Having brains placed one in the social misfit group of elementary and junior high school. I fit right into this group though as we all walked to different drummers and in this we found sanctuary and friendship. We were the geeks, the nerds, the freaks, the dweebs, the outcasts. United by our differences and yet set apart from each other by our differences. I learned so much from these great people that I would never have learned had fate not thrown us together. I discovered that I could help people learn. I was a better teacher than many of the teachers in my school. I could sit down with the slow students and explain the material much better and clearer than my teachers. I can remember anything if I reduce it to music or rhythm. I shared this technique and they really did well with it. They each shared with me their favorite music styles and I learned to appreciate the wide variety of music. I learned to judge someone by their heart not by their skin color, their clothing style, or their outward appearance. I have several good friends who are prejudged by their outward appearances all the time. One is a huge bear of a man. He is a bald headed heavy set man with full sleeves on both arms. He rides a Harley and wears his leathers proudly. When he rides up strangers want to lock their children and lady folk up as they are sure he has come to rape and pillage. Yet he is an ordained minister who does not swear, drink, and is totally devoted to his wife. He is more likely to greet you with a big bear hug and tell you that God loves you than anything else. Friend number two is from the country of Bangladesh. He is 5 ft and a maybe that. He is a university professor and speaks with a perfect British accent. He used to wear a full beard but after 9/11 he was attacked on the street to often for being an Arab and shaved it off. He can call a business and make reservations to come in and they are expecting this 6 ft white Brit to come walking in. Instead this little brown man walks in and speaks perfect English and suddenly the welcome mat gets rolled up. He is one of the smartest men I know. I know he is smarter than me, we have raced doing the Times crossword puzzle, and he always finishes ahead of me. The third friend is a doctor from Kenya. He also has a great British accent and has some very jet black skin. Americans cannot or will not take the time to learn how to pronounce his real name so he has shortened it to a name they can say. When he makes dinner reservations for Dr. _ in his British accent the reservation person gets real excited but when this dark skinned black man shows up he is ignored. Then when he speaks or they realize he really is an M.D. he gets served. I still get the stares, hear the whispers, and see the eyes of neighbors or the parents of my sons classmates. I am a round peg in a square world. I will never fit in perfectly but that is okay. I like myself and have the love of those people who really matter to me. Embrace the whatever which makes you you.