vulgarkov

If I were a tree, I'd be the handsomest healthiest tree in the park. All the super-hot botanist-chicks would drive fifty-plus miles to handle my bark and manipulate my leaves. (It wouldn't matter to me though because I would be a mutha-fuckin' tree.) All the cool dogs would walk past all of the lesser shrubbery and fire hydrants to pay liquid homage to my magnificence. Still, I wouldn't even notice -- tree time is much slower than people time after all...

Ahhh... if I only were a tree...

fucking-A