Minutes from the Quarterly Hobo Clown Meeting
By Kristi Harrison Sep 3rd, 2009
A meeting of the Hobo Clowns of North Ohio (HCNO) was held in Akron on August 31, 2009 in the Alliance Train Station.
Members present:
Tourniquet Sam
Nutter Buster
Juan the Mexican
Professor Pantless and his Putrid Arm
Not Present:
Upchucks McGee
Lord Lordy Jesus
Call to Order
Juan the Mexican reviewed the agenda and welcomed everyone to the meeting. Nutter Buster explained Lordy Lord Jesus was entertaining at a five-year-old's birthday party. Someone muttered "God help them."
Treasurer's Report
Tourniquet Sam read the treasurer's report. As of August, the HCNO held 3 cans of Beefaroni, 6 surplus handkerchiefs (2 stained with dry blood), some greasepaint and $1.27 in change. Juan the Mexican asked if the Canadian pennies had been removed from the treasury yet. Tourniquet Sam replied in the negative.
President's Report
Professor Pantsless and his Putrid Arm began the president's report. Nutter Buster interrupted with a motion to disband the Hobo Clown organization and reconstitute as separate entities. He said he'd like to go back to living in a house. No one seconded the motion. Nutter Buster shed a solitary tear then withdrew his membership. A dust cloud followed him as he left the room. Professor Pantsless and his Putrid Arm continued his report by announcing the club had secured the job of entertaining at the First Baptist Church of Columbus fall picnic next month. Tournequet Sam asked how the hell they were supposed to get to Columbus. P.P. and his P.A. shrugged. Juan the Mexican said he owned an RV and could drive them there. Everyone stared at him. Tournequet Sam said, "what do you mean you own an RV? What part of hobo don't you understand?" Juan the Mexican said "I like being a clown but I like peeing behind closed doors, thank you very much!" Then T.S. said, "You wanna go a round, Border Boy?" Then P.P. and his P.A. said, "No fisticuffs! It's in the charter!" and he threw his red nose into the middle of the room, which was a universal hobo clown sign of cease fire. The members present bowed their heads and said a prayer for the hobo clowns gone on to the great boxcar in the sky, then shook hands and hugged a little bit. Professor Pantless and his Putrid Arm said it would be a good time to go roast some weiners over a barrel, and called the meeting to its conclusion.
*From the blog Here in Idaho
By Kristi Harrison Sep 3rd, 2009
A meeting of the Hobo Clowns of North Ohio (HCNO) was held in Akron on August 31, 2009 in the Alliance Train Station.
Members present:
Tourniquet Sam
Nutter Buster
Juan the Mexican
Professor Pantless and his Putrid Arm
Not Present:
Upchucks McGee
Lord Lordy Jesus
Call to Order
Juan the Mexican reviewed the agenda and welcomed everyone to the meeting. Nutter Buster explained Lordy Lord Jesus was entertaining at a five-year-old's birthday party. Someone muttered "God help them."
Treasurer's Report
Tourniquet Sam read the treasurer's report. As of August, the HCNO held 3 cans of Beefaroni, 6 surplus handkerchiefs (2 stained with dry blood), some greasepaint and $1.27 in change. Juan the Mexican asked if the Canadian pennies had been removed from the treasury yet. Tourniquet Sam replied in the negative.
President's Report
Professor Pantsless and his Putrid Arm began the president's report. Nutter Buster interrupted with a motion to disband the Hobo Clown organization and reconstitute as separate entities. He said he'd like to go back to living in a house. No one seconded the motion. Nutter Buster shed a solitary tear then withdrew his membership. A dust cloud followed him as he left the room. Professor Pantsless and his Putrid Arm continued his report by announcing the club had secured the job of entertaining at the First Baptist Church of Columbus fall picnic next month. Tournequet Sam asked how the hell they were supposed to get to Columbus. P.P. and his P.A. shrugged. Juan the Mexican said he owned an RV and could drive them there. Everyone stared at him. Tournequet Sam said, "what do you mean you own an RV? What part of hobo don't you understand?" Juan the Mexican said "I like being a clown but I like peeing behind closed doors, thank you very much!" Then T.S. said, "You wanna go a round, Border Boy?" Then P.P. and his P.A. said, "No fisticuffs! It's in the charter!" and he threw his red nose into the middle of the room, which was a universal hobo clown sign of cease fire. The members present bowed their heads and said a prayer for the hobo clowns gone on to the great boxcar in the sky, then shook hands and hugged a little bit. Professor Pantless and his Putrid Arm said it would be a good time to go roast some weiners over a barrel, and called the meeting to its conclusion.
*From the blog Here in Idaho