Good god, It's kinda hot out today.... It's gotta be, like, 80 degrees today... I feel like a dumb ass for wearing black now..... Hello SG......
DREAMS...
My head is a strange place to be...I had a wierd dream last night/this morning that I was living on another planet. that's a new theme for me... I think it was mars... I'm forgetting this dream as quickly as I am trying to remeber it.... damn! maybe it will come back to me later.... My dreams are fucking interesting. half the time I don't even want to get up and come out of them. I haven't had a good nightmare in a long time. I wonder if this is due to the fact that I know that I'm having a nightmare when I'm in it So I just start looking around at all the creepy cool imagery... I always know i'm in a "nightmare" because the dream is in dark drab colors. I have painted a couple of them. There are a few more that I would still like to paint...... I haven't had any of my recurring dreams(I have three of them; all different) in a long time... I wonder what that's about. I am used to all three and all three of them are rad, because I already know the layout of the dream...... If I keep talking about this you'll probably think I'm crazy.....
BLACK NAIL POLISH
Have you ever noticed that black nail polish makes your hands look kinda dirty? I painted my nails black at work last night for the first time in five or so years. I also used really shitty polish, and i can't wait to redo them. don't buy polish from sephora, It's garbage. It chips fast, dries slow, and takes too many coats.... My favorite black polish is either Loreal jet set, or Dior.......
WORK
Is so good to me! thank you universe! plus, I told my boss that I couldn't work more than three days a week, because If I did, I'd be taking another six weeks off... and he agreed that that would suck. So, I still have my same old schedule.... wed, fri, sat...... Hopefully when I work in portland it will be as good as it is for me here right now, because If this keeps up, It's not going to take that long to get back to where I was. If you just heard a little tap-tap-tapping, It was me rapping three times on my desk; it's made of wood.
MY WORLD
Is starting to be a great place to be again. I really hope it continues this way. I just have to learn to talk about my feelings to people Or just someone for that matter, and not stuff them down like I always have. this is easier said than done. But I'm really gonna try. I'm starting to be happier, Now that I can afford to eat again. Being broke will really get to you after a while. I still can't afford that Dior handbag that I want, But hopefully that won't last forever. I guess we'll see, eh?
WISHLIST
Yup I have one. and this is me whoring it out. food not bombs is a great organization. please donate to them... I volunteer for them from time to time. It's a small attempt to change the world. my belief is that if you truly want to change the world, you have to start by changing the world around you.....
ciao.
xoxox-Voltaire
I'm going to start something different for a change.... Instead of me just asking you three questions and you answering them, how about I ask you three questions, and You ask me ONE(I repeat, ONE) question, and in my next journal entry I'll answer the three I liked best.... Kinda like ask three/answer three.... can you dig?
-name three qualities you look for in a prospective boy/girlfriend.
-If you could drop everything, and leave tomorrow, where would you go?
-If I kept a journal that was strictly tales from the sex industry/modeling industry, would you read it?
*BONUS: did you actually read my whole journal?
don't forget to ask me a question.
DREAMS...
My head is a strange place to be...I had a wierd dream last night/this morning that I was living on another planet. that's a new theme for me... I think it was mars... I'm forgetting this dream as quickly as I am trying to remeber it.... damn! maybe it will come back to me later.... My dreams are fucking interesting. half the time I don't even want to get up and come out of them. I haven't had a good nightmare in a long time. I wonder if this is due to the fact that I know that I'm having a nightmare when I'm in it So I just start looking around at all the creepy cool imagery... I always know i'm in a "nightmare" because the dream is in dark drab colors. I have painted a couple of them. There are a few more that I would still like to paint...... I haven't had any of my recurring dreams(I have three of them; all different) in a long time... I wonder what that's about. I am used to all three and all three of them are rad, because I already know the layout of the dream...... If I keep talking about this you'll probably think I'm crazy.....
BLACK NAIL POLISH
Have you ever noticed that black nail polish makes your hands look kinda dirty? I painted my nails black at work last night for the first time in five or so years. I also used really shitty polish, and i can't wait to redo them. don't buy polish from sephora, It's garbage. It chips fast, dries slow, and takes too many coats.... My favorite black polish is either Loreal jet set, or Dior.......
WORK
Is so good to me! thank you universe! plus, I told my boss that I couldn't work more than three days a week, because If I did, I'd be taking another six weeks off... and he agreed that that would suck. So, I still have my same old schedule.... wed, fri, sat...... Hopefully when I work in portland it will be as good as it is for me here right now, because If this keeps up, It's not going to take that long to get back to where I was. If you just heard a little tap-tap-tapping, It was me rapping three times on my desk; it's made of wood.
MY WORLD
Is starting to be a great place to be again. I really hope it continues this way. I just have to learn to talk about my feelings to people Or just someone for that matter, and not stuff them down like I always have. this is easier said than done. But I'm really gonna try. I'm starting to be happier, Now that I can afford to eat again. Being broke will really get to you after a while. I still can't afford that Dior handbag that I want, But hopefully that won't last forever. I guess we'll see, eh?
WISHLIST
Yup I have one. and this is me whoring it out. food not bombs is a great organization. please donate to them... I volunteer for them from time to time. It's a small attempt to change the world. my belief is that if you truly want to change the world, you have to start by changing the world around you.....
ciao.
xoxox-Voltaire
I'm going to start something different for a change.... Instead of me just asking you three questions and you answering them, how about I ask you three questions, and You ask me ONE(I repeat, ONE) question, and in my next journal entry I'll answer the three I liked best.... Kinda like ask three/answer three.... can you dig?
-name three qualities you look for in a prospective boy/girlfriend.
-If you could drop everything, and leave tomorrow, where would you go?
-If I kept a journal that was strictly tales from the sex industry/modeling industry, would you read it?
*BONUS: did you actually read my whole journal?
don't forget to ask me a question.
VIEW 25 of 97 COMMENTS
2. New Zealand. My boy is travelling around and i wont see him until September so i would goto him
3. Damn straight!
Bonus: But of course...
Question: People say that your life revolves around big circumstances that have happened in your life. Like hurricanes, so to speak. Do you have any that you can think of?
I would look for (obviously there are things that get you to this point..) honesty. I goddamned hate dishonest folks, and I cherish those that I trust.
I would (honestly) go to Ireland. It would be nice to hop accross to the UK, but Ireland for certain.
It would be sexually exciting, but that would only go so far. I think that the kind of people that I would want to "talk" to, would stick around for more than the hot and seedy tales from the pole.
Yes I did. I am particularly pleased to read that you have a healthy appreciation for what matters (people and the planet) yet you still enjoy some of the finer things, like a Dior bag. That is really refreshing. When you get to PDX again, give a ring, if you don't mind two cute fireballs, called children, Treana and I would enjoy having you over for dinner
Q: Most awe inspiring moment?
You mention being happy when surprised by amazingness. I was once climbing a small mountian/giant hill in the Mojave desert, and came accross a huge condor floating in the wind of a natural rock bowl, which was roughly the size of a small baseball stadium. I watched him for 40 minutes before I knew that any time had passed. While I am telling you this now, I couldn't begin to explain the feelings and emotion that I feel/felt then. I knew then (1990) that me and my place in the world was smaller than I ever thought.
Now, did you read all of mine?
[Edited on Mar 16, 2005 2:52PM]