Was just watching a show called 'Anderson' and the theme was 'Suburban polygamy' which I think was a mistake since they were highlighting a poly-amorous relationship(s). I was pleasantly pleased with the way the audience comported themselves and were open to such a new reality-kudos! There are still things being said on both poly and mono "sides" that are just not giving each other full acknowledgment but this is huge!
One of my healthiest and most empowered relationships was a poly-amorous relationship. I began to heal so much within it. There was a great friendship between the 3 of us. The Man in the relationship really began my healing with Men and was one of the first Men to really honor me. It was so because the lines of communication were open, the intention clear. I am now at a space where open relating is no longer my truth, however, I remain clear that open relating can be really beautiful for those for whom it is authentic. And giving permission for that to shift is authentic. For me that poly relationship was very authentic and loving. I find it exciting to see this opening up to conversations. It is important to remember, just because it is not authentic for you, does not mean it is invalid or shallow. A main argument-and I was shocked to hear this from a psychiatrist...but really am I shocked? People have a tendency to only validate what they personally experience or believe in-was that poly relationships could not get very deep. I completely disagree! Being in love with more than one person is completely possible and you can go to great depths with each other if this is how it is real for you to be. In the poly relationship, his love for both of us was very evident and felt, I was completely in love with him and him with us. This concept may boggle people's minds and that is OK it does not need to be fully understood, just is wonderful when all the different authentic relationships are heard
That being said, I disagree when the argument turns the other way and portrays monogamy as fear based, co-dependent insecurity. Again, if monogamous living is not for you, live on, however, to make a persons choice for monogamy just a pattern of society-don't get me wrong, it has been the 'grand' default for many reasons and seasons in our society-is also insulting. It all comes down to Authentic relationship. Whatever that looks like, as long as all parties are in agreement, aware, authentic, nurtured and loved, safe then by all means rainbow on!!! Lack of communication and clarity cause rifts in ANY kind of relating. All relationships have their ups and downs, it's all about staying in the authentic groove of your soul and sharing your love
One of my healthiest and most empowered relationships was a poly-amorous relationship. I began to heal so much within it. There was a great friendship between the 3 of us. The Man in the relationship really began my healing with Men and was one of the first Men to really honor me. It was so because the lines of communication were open, the intention clear. I am now at a space where open relating is no longer my truth, however, I remain clear that open relating can be really beautiful for those for whom it is authentic. And giving permission for that to shift is authentic. For me that poly relationship was very authentic and loving. I find it exciting to see this opening up to conversations. It is important to remember, just because it is not authentic for you, does not mean it is invalid or shallow. A main argument-and I was shocked to hear this from a psychiatrist...but really am I shocked? People have a tendency to only validate what they personally experience or believe in-was that poly relationships could not get very deep. I completely disagree! Being in love with more than one person is completely possible and you can go to great depths with each other if this is how it is real for you to be. In the poly relationship, his love for both of us was very evident and felt, I was completely in love with him and him with us. This concept may boggle people's minds and that is OK it does not need to be fully understood, just is wonderful when all the different authentic relationships are heard
That being said, I disagree when the argument turns the other way and portrays monogamy as fear based, co-dependent insecurity. Again, if monogamous living is not for you, live on, however, to make a persons choice for monogamy just a pattern of society-don't get me wrong, it has been the 'grand' default for many reasons and seasons in our society-is also insulting. It all comes down to Authentic relationship. Whatever that looks like, as long as all parties are in agreement, aware, authentic, nurtured and loved, safe then by all means rainbow on!!! Lack of communication and clarity cause rifts in ANY kind of relating. All relationships have their ups and downs, it's all about staying in the authentic groove of your soul and sharing your love