vithen

This is so hard to pick, I feel like I’ve never really been immensely full of joy, like we expect it to be because movies and marketing are telling us how happiness looks like… on the other hand I have so many great memories I treasure a lot, like meeting my baby sister, or hearing her say her first words, or coming back home after many years of being away from my family and having them receive me at the airport with the utmost love, having a friend help me clean my house when I was depressed, sharing a genuine conversation with my distant father.

I decided to go for an odd moment that felt… well …off at the moment, but really special in hindsight.

On a work trip to China (many years ago) where I was very emotionally distressed there was a moment where I felt more like myself than I’ve ever had, it was 4 am on a Wednesday and the weather was freezing cold, I don’t/ didn’t speak any Chinese, but my business associate had written a sheet out for me 5 items of food she knew I’d love (fried sugary bread, some sort of soup, a bowl of sow milk, vegan dumplings and rice) I handed it to the cashier working in the 24hr fast food restaurant in front of my hotel and had a lot of food on my table, another buyer I had met earlier was also out there, and didn’t know what to order so we shared my giant meal and talked about missing home (I had been there for almost a month) and hadn’t/didn’t have the chance to visit the landmarks, but I shared a real conversation with a stranger, it could’ve/should’ve been akward, but I felt more home than I had since I was a child, I suddenly didn’t care about anyone’s opinions or impressions of me, I often think of this memory, how sick I got being there, the food, people’s kindness, culture, feeling different, connecting despite the differences… feeling like a part of a wholeness, part of everything and everyone without a need of being different, noticed or special and I kind of miss it, like feeling this longing for feeling that kind of nostalgia.
Bitter sweet, simple, different… some would see nothing special or memorable, to me, it is a memory I’ll continue to treasure for as long as my mind will allow me to do so.

What is one of your favorite or happiest memories?

@penny @missy