I was at the bar other night and got an idea...
im gonna start posting the odd off the wall shit you overhear from drunks in bars...
Night one:

You know its good to be a heathen sometimes.

Same night:

The guy that banned smoking in public places is the same guy that goes around molesting children.

Still same 2 guys LOL :

You know when i was 5 i was smart enough that when a nun took me in the boys bathroom and told me to take off my pants i screamed.