Y'know its amazing to me the amount of attention i get when I am single. It's like when I am in a relationship other men might flirt or try to contact me through myspace but i totally have blinders on and I don't even notice. The second I am single, i start notice that hot guy from across the room checking me out while i am dancing. Guys start flirting and holding extra long conversations with me, ex boyfriends come out of the wood work wanting to hang out again.
. IT's weird. I love the attention. It reminds me of why being single is so much fun. I always feel the closest to myself and to being my best when I am single because I don't ever identify my self worth with the way that anyone else feels about me, the way I do when I am with someone. Maybe I am just not made for serious relationships, maybe I will have many loves kind of come in and out of my life, without much of a committment, and every time it happens its always beautiful and fun, and can end sad and tragic at the end...but its always an amazing thing when it does happen. I don't really care anymore, my standards are pretty high though. It's like if I am going to give up this beautiful single life he has to have the following characteristics for me to even consider wanting to seriously date him.
They say if you write things down your much more likely to accomplish them because you have firmly stated in your mind what you want, so that you will be able to identify things conciously when you see them.
1.) he has to be at little bit more into me than i am into him
2.) he has to be incredibly charming and funny
3.) he needs to not drink or do drugs too much
4.) he has to want to be serious with me, and not half serious, but really want me and only me,
5.) he needs to have an adequate sized skin flute... and if not as adequate as needed must be able to give gspot orgasms with oral
6.) he has to know how to give me a gspot orgasm period...
7.) he can't be needy
8.) he has to have his shit together at least somewhat, a career with some kind of a future,, a working car, no addictions, no major ex relationship baggage, and some direction in life.
9.) must have great hobbies
10.) great tattoos
11.) must want children in the future, and/or would love children enough that if things didn't work out that he could still be a good dad, in their life, and a good infleucne... and is at least open to the idea of marriage
12.) must love to travel
13.) must be somewhat artistic whether it be with writing, music or design
14.) must like dogs and isn't too much of a cat lover since i'm allergic
15.) must be adventurous and spontaneous
16.) must be somewhat romantic
17.) he has to stand up for himself, cause no one wants a pushover
18.) must challenge me mentally, spirtually and emotionally
19.) preferably not ever been married or with children (however every situation is different)
20.) must love sushi... bonus if he loves wine and coffee
21.) must not smoke cigarettes, at least habitually
22.) must be very respectful of me and not flirt with other girls in front of me
23.) must be a giver, and ok with me being a giver too
24.) must be ready for anything
25.) cannot have an anger problem
26.) must not be too critical of things that are not important, such as criticizing clothing or just being uneccesarily rude
27.) honest but in a nice way
28.) must love my feet
29.) must love curvy girls
30.) must not be intimidated by a strong independent woman
31.) must want to include me in his life with his friends and family but not revovle his life around me
32.) must be somewhat healthy
33.) must be happy with his life
34.) must be very happy with himself but open to improving himself
35.) must not have a history of cheating
36.) must be fun to sleep next to
37.) must be affectionate and loves to kiss!
38.) must be a good kisser
39.) cannot be any sort of a liar
40.) Being decisive is important
41.) Must not be overly religious or fantatic about anything
42.) must be somewhat liberal
43.) must have adequate libidio
44.) must be over the age of 25 and under the age of 35
45.) I have to think their adorable, hot, or unique
46.) of course must love me unconditionally
47.) must be adventurous in bed, and knows their way around
whelp I think that is all i can think of for the moment. of course I may not ever be with someoen who embodies all of those qualities, but I am sure someone out there has at least a good majority of them. Everyone has their flaws and weaknesses including myself since there are things on my list that I don't even have, but this is just as much of a list for things that I want to change in my life as it is for wanting to find those things in someone else.
I will miss the little things about mr. lee, i will miss the way I feel when I wake up with him in the morning. or when he calls me monstere. and how if I am sad, instead of being stupid and not knowing how to deal with me being emotional, he'll hold me close and not let me hide.
i'll also miss the kisses, and all i can think about is how happy i am to have someone so sweet and loving. I love kissing him more than i have ever loved kissing or cuddling with anyone. he is my best friend, and its so hard to let him go.
ah well at least i still have his friendship and my life back, without the worry of anything but me.
. IT's weird. I love the attention. It reminds me of why being single is so much fun. I always feel the closest to myself and to being my best when I am single because I don't ever identify my self worth with the way that anyone else feels about me, the way I do when I am with someone. Maybe I am just not made for serious relationships, maybe I will have many loves kind of come in and out of my life, without much of a committment, and every time it happens its always beautiful and fun, and can end sad and tragic at the end...but its always an amazing thing when it does happen. I don't really care anymore, my standards are pretty high though. It's like if I am going to give up this beautiful single life he has to have the following characteristics for me to even consider wanting to seriously date him.
They say if you write things down your much more likely to accomplish them because you have firmly stated in your mind what you want, so that you will be able to identify things conciously when you see them.
1.) he has to be at little bit more into me than i am into him
2.) he has to be incredibly charming and funny
3.) he needs to not drink or do drugs too much
4.) he has to want to be serious with me, and not half serious, but really want me and only me,
5.) he needs to have an adequate sized skin flute... and if not as adequate as needed must be able to give gspot orgasms with oral
6.) he has to know how to give me a gspot orgasm period...
7.) he can't be needy
8.) he has to have his shit together at least somewhat, a career with some kind of a future,, a working car, no addictions, no major ex relationship baggage, and some direction in life.
9.) must have great hobbies
10.) great tattoos
11.) must want children in the future, and/or would love children enough that if things didn't work out that he could still be a good dad, in their life, and a good infleucne... and is at least open to the idea of marriage
12.) must love to travel
13.) must be somewhat artistic whether it be with writing, music or design
14.) must like dogs and isn't too much of a cat lover since i'm allergic
15.) must be adventurous and spontaneous
16.) must be somewhat romantic
17.) he has to stand up for himself, cause no one wants a pushover
18.) must challenge me mentally, spirtually and emotionally
19.) preferably not ever been married or with children (however every situation is different)
20.) must love sushi... bonus if he loves wine and coffee
21.) must not smoke cigarettes, at least habitually
22.) must be very respectful of me and not flirt with other girls in front of me
23.) must be a giver, and ok with me being a giver too
24.) must be ready for anything
25.) cannot have an anger problem
26.) must not be too critical of things that are not important, such as criticizing clothing or just being uneccesarily rude
27.) honest but in a nice way
28.) must love my feet
29.) must love curvy girls
30.) must not be intimidated by a strong independent woman
31.) must want to include me in his life with his friends and family but not revovle his life around me
32.) must be somewhat healthy
33.) must be happy with his life
34.) must be very happy with himself but open to improving himself
35.) must not have a history of cheating
36.) must be fun to sleep next to
37.) must be affectionate and loves to kiss!
38.) must be a good kisser
39.) cannot be any sort of a liar
40.) Being decisive is important
41.) Must not be overly religious or fantatic about anything
42.) must be somewhat liberal
43.) must have adequate libidio
44.) must be over the age of 25 and under the age of 35
45.) I have to think their adorable, hot, or unique
46.) of course must love me unconditionally
47.) must be adventurous in bed, and knows their way around
whelp I think that is all i can think of for the moment. of course I may not ever be with someoen who embodies all of those qualities, but I am sure someone out there has at least a good majority of them. Everyone has their flaws and weaknesses including myself since there are things on my list that I don't even have, but this is just as much of a list for things that I want to change in my life as it is for wanting to find those things in someone else.
I will miss the little things about mr. lee, i will miss the way I feel when I wake up with him in the morning. or when he calls me monstere. and how if I am sad, instead of being stupid and not knowing how to deal with me being emotional, he'll hold me close and not let me hide.
i'll also miss the kisses, and all i can think about is how happy i am to have someone so sweet and loving. I love kissing him more than i have ever loved kissing or cuddling with anyone. he is my best friend, and its so hard to let him go.
ah well at least i still have his friendship and my life back, without the worry of anything but me.
punknitemike:
i love the relationship stuff you talk about in your journal, it makes me want one! im kinda hanging out with this girl but she's not ready for a relationship quite yet cause she was in one for 4 years prior. but she has told me there is potential, is there anything i should have done or being doing to help this along? i like her alot & i do wanna relationship with her, but i dont want to rush her! know what i mean?