Ok I feel its time to update. Everything in life is actually really good right now. I just got a new job doing graphic design full time, the dj academy is taking off, and all my friendships are strong.
I feel like somehow with everything that has happened with me in the last month there is a method to the madness. Thank god, the 22 year old boytoy wouldn't committ. I was so sad about it for 2 weeks, and now I realize how stupid I was. What was I thinking? oh well, I learned a lot and had fun, can't ask for much more than that. Everything happens for a reason, and he would have been a terrible boyfriend. I do think however someday we will be friends.
So this new boy in my life, kind of came out of the woodwork. What's strange is he used to be an SG member and met me 3 years ago at the burlesque show, I didn't pay any attention to him every interaction I had, until most recently. I have an issue with boys that like me, I have a tendency to not even give them a chance because it seems so easy, but somehow he won me over and now I am really happy that he was persistent.
The new boy is one of the more thoughtful boys I have dated in a long time. I have no predictions for the future, but the nice thing is not to care what happens either way, I'm just going along for the ride.
The whole situation reminds me of how many times I would plan a future with someone and it would always turn out totally opposite of how I would hope. And here I'm dating a person who changes my mind how things should be, how I define what a relationship should be-- on a daily basis. I have never dated anyone like him, and I have never had someone kind of meet me head to head and challenge me mentally, treat me respectfully, give me lots of attention and actually enjoy it.
Everyday I get to know him things get more intesting, , he is easy going, but complex, he is mature in one sense because he is older and has lots of life experience but at the same time doesn't take himself too seriously and can act like a kid -- and it doesn't come across as being immature. He is emotional but not too feminine, masculine but not too cocky, he's the perfect height and he has these really piercing blue eyes. I think what I like the most about him currently is his sense of humor. he is getting really good at harassing me, and I seriously love to be harassed. It makes me not take anything to seriously and constantly is keeping me on my tosies.
I am cautious and I am trying to not jump into things too quickly because I have this theory, what goes up quickly will come down quickly. I am trying to put off getting too intimate too soon because I want to know the real reasons why I like or don't like him. Sex can totally help form my opinion of someone when they are rocking yer world day in and day out. If there is no rockin, then it is just him., and then I can develop or not develop feelings naturally instead of sexually/chemically.
The nice thing is knowing that right now, is that the possiblities are endless. No rush, we have all the time in the world. And if tomorrow we wake up and are not into it, its not that big of deal because no matter what he is becoming a really good friend.
The thing that is really fun, is I have the upper hand, and I never have the upper hand. I mean I have had the upper hand quite a few times, but it was always with boys that I didn't ever intend on having it go past casual. I love it now cause I don't have to worry about anything.
The adventure is fun, and I'm interested to see where it goes.
Yay for adventures. Let's get swilly!
I feel like somehow with everything that has happened with me in the last month there is a method to the madness. Thank god, the 22 year old boytoy wouldn't committ. I was so sad about it for 2 weeks, and now I realize how stupid I was. What was I thinking? oh well, I learned a lot and had fun, can't ask for much more than that. Everything happens for a reason, and he would have been a terrible boyfriend. I do think however someday we will be friends.
So this new boy in my life, kind of came out of the woodwork. What's strange is he used to be an SG member and met me 3 years ago at the burlesque show, I didn't pay any attention to him every interaction I had, until most recently. I have an issue with boys that like me, I have a tendency to not even give them a chance because it seems so easy, but somehow he won me over and now I am really happy that he was persistent.
The new boy is one of the more thoughtful boys I have dated in a long time. I have no predictions for the future, but the nice thing is not to care what happens either way, I'm just going along for the ride.
The whole situation reminds me of how many times I would plan a future with someone and it would always turn out totally opposite of how I would hope. And here I'm dating a person who changes my mind how things should be, how I define what a relationship should be-- on a daily basis. I have never dated anyone like him, and I have never had someone kind of meet me head to head and challenge me mentally, treat me respectfully, give me lots of attention and actually enjoy it.
Everyday I get to know him things get more intesting, , he is easy going, but complex, he is mature in one sense because he is older and has lots of life experience but at the same time doesn't take himself too seriously and can act like a kid -- and it doesn't come across as being immature. He is emotional but not too feminine, masculine but not too cocky, he's the perfect height and he has these really piercing blue eyes. I think what I like the most about him currently is his sense of humor. he is getting really good at harassing me, and I seriously love to be harassed. It makes me not take anything to seriously and constantly is keeping me on my tosies.
I am cautious and I am trying to not jump into things too quickly because I have this theory, what goes up quickly will come down quickly. I am trying to put off getting too intimate too soon because I want to know the real reasons why I like or don't like him. Sex can totally help form my opinion of someone when they are rocking yer world day in and day out. If there is no rockin, then it is just him., and then I can develop or not develop feelings naturally instead of sexually/chemically.
The nice thing is knowing that right now, is that the possiblities are endless. No rush, we have all the time in the world. And if tomorrow we wake up and are not into it, its not that big of deal because no matter what he is becoming a really good friend.
The thing that is really fun, is I have the upper hand, and I never have the upper hand. I mean I have had the upper hand quite a few times, but it was always with boys that I didn't ever intend on having it go past casual. I love it now cause I don't have to worry about anything.
The adventure is fun, and I'm interested to see where it goes.
Yay for adventures. Let's get swilly!