I know how many of us on here adore a good old self-indulgent mump about the medication were on. And, never liking to miss a bandwagon as it trundles gently by, I thought Id post my offering.
Been on and off these here green pills for the last few years. You see I have these recurrent depressions, and the bastards wont seem to let me alone. What a bore. Im afraid I stopped taking my tablets a few months ago, not for any particular reason but because I kept forgetting and I couldnt be arsed. So having lately been spending much more time getting acquainted with the underside of my duvet, and being told, you really dont seem to be coping very well, (Do I not? No. Oh.) I slunk into the doctors office for the bollocking that was due me.
Actually, he didnt bollock me but he did say that I might just have to be on the antidepressants all my life. Pending cure by hypnosis/finding God, obviously. Speaking of which, if I was reading tarot with any regularity, you know things would be much better. As things are, I am 24 and still waiting for my life to start, my flat is full of confusion, my fingers on the keyboard just tap out anger and resentment, and the clubs I dress up for are full of the smell of disappointment. It may be that other people arent really enjoying life any more than I am, I conceded to the doctor. But the feeling is that they are? I have my strong suspicions.
I dont need the smug folk who say, you can take the pills to make you feel a false happiness, but the real issues havent gone away. This model of thought gives the world-view of the depressive far more credence than it deserves. Depression is a kind of delusion. How can you see how to put things right, when you have this illness that warps your perspective? Its true enough that there are many aspects of my life that arent as I want them. But how can I, for example, get my career sorted, when I cant even get out of bed?
Meanwhile, I noticed that my *over-inflated ego stardom* (Manko's phrase) has missed an obvious corner of the internet. So I have joined myspace. That settles it then.
*Self-obsessed*
Been on and off these here green pills for the last few years. You see I have these recurrent depressions, and the bastards wont seem to let me alone. What a bore. Im afraid I stopped taking my tablets a few months ago, not for any particular reason but because I kept forgetting and I couldnt be arsed. So having lately been spending much more time getting acquainted with the underside of my duvet, and being told, you really dont seem to be coping very well, (Do I not? No. Oh.) I slunk into the doctors office for the bollocking that was due me.
Actually, he didnt bollock me but he did say that I might just have to be on the antidepressants all my life. Pending cure by hypnosis/finding God, obviously. Speaking of which, if I was reading tarot with any regularity, you know things would be much better. As things are, I am 24 and still waiting for my life to start, my flat is full of confusion, my fingers on the keyboard just tap out anger and resentment, and the clubs I dress up for are full of the smell of disappointment. It may be that other people arent really enjoying life any more than I am, I conceded to the doctor. But the feeling is that they are? I have my strong suspicions.
I dont need the smug folk who say, you can take the pills to make you feel a false happiness, but the real issues havent gone away. This model of thought gives the world-view of the depressive far more credence than it deserves. Depression is a kind of delusion. How can you see how to put things right, when you have this illness that warps your perspective? Its true enough that there are many aspects of my life that arent as I want them. But how can I, for example, get my career sorted, when I cant even get out of bed?
Meanwhile, I noticed that my *over-inflated ego stardom* (Manko's phrase) has missed an obvious corner of the internet. So I have joined myspace. That settles it then.
*Self-obsessed*
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So I'm with you on all this. You just gotta make yourself get outta bed.
and maybe take the meds.
and maybe read more tarot.
ps. I tagged you a coupla days ago.