I have no idea how to bootstrap myself out of this hell hole. Professional help is non existent or vapid. I barely leave the house these days and my only conversations are with myself. It’s my fault, I know, I know don’t deserve happiness, let alone love. But it’s still difficult to accept.
Difficult to accept, yes you are in a death trap, there is no escape. Everything will get worse. Chances of escape to a mediocre existence with fleeting joy: 0%
Then why don’t you just end it? I don’t know man. It’s a hassle, trust me.
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headshot:
Everyone deserves happiness and love. There are no exceptions. Desperate acts are committed because of just their lack. If you feel that everything is very bad, you need to contact a specialist immediately. It's better to spend money than to live in hell. And there's nothing worse than being alone at a time like this. Hey, text me DM. I apologize in advance if my reply is delayed. Communication can bring relief, but only therapy and antidepressants can relieve severe depression.
skisby:
I don’t have any answers I’m afraid but I have found stoicism to be helpful. I’m not joking when I tell you that the Dory quote from Finding Nemo plays constantly in my head -“Just keep swimming”!! Also this quote - The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.— RALPH WALDO EMERSON